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GentlePunk

Seinfeld 175Eps 9 done 166 to go
September 24

It's Been 5 years

yesterday i was watching Supernatural Season 5 Episode 2... with my mom
she thought this series became boring, and i responded ,sure it's boring ,it's been 5 years.
we've been watching this for the whole 5 years!
the same thing happens with Criminal Minds, the season 5 too.
I think it's not the story interested me, it's more about the character
I understood the connection, confusion, or the conflict between the characters... I don't care too much about where does the storyline goes.
 
and besides, It's kinda like a connection between the main character and us the viewers.
maybe it's the last year of the Supernatural. and it seems not the end of the Criminal Minds.
I'll be with the BAU like forever.
It's been 5 years, their lives. How about My life in these 5 years.
July 27

Seinfeld S2 EP04

1991年2月13日
第二季第四集
电话留言
The plot is based on a real-life experience of Larry David's.
这集是根据拉里.大卫(制片人之一)的真实经历改编的。
The Nielsen ratings for this episode were so low that the show was put on hiatus and considered for cancellation. It would return two months later.
这集的收视率实在太低,导致整个剧集面临被砍的危险。
Plot summary for "Seinfeld" The Phone Message
George leaves several nasty messages on a girlfriend's answering machine, then decides to steal the tape.
情节概要:
乔治在一个女朋友的答录机里留下了几条恶心的留言,然后决定去偷磁带。
Jerry's opening monologue:
The bad thing about television is that everybody you see on television is doing something better than what you're doing. Did you ever see anybody on TV like just sliding off the front of the sofa with potato chip crumbs on their face? Some people have a little too much fun on television: the soda
commercial people - where do they summon this enthusiasm? Have you seen them? "We have soda, we have soda, we have soda", jumping, laughing, flying through the air - it's a can of soda. Have you ever been standing there and you're watching TV and you're drinking the exact same product that they're advertising right there on TV, and it's like, you know, they're spiking volleyballs, jetskiing, girls in bikinis and I'm standing there - "Maybe I'm putting too much ice in mine."
杰瑞的开场秀:
关于电视不好的一点是因为电视上的家伙做什么看起来都比你自己做得好。你肯定看不到电视里的人会滑下沙发,然后薯片洒了出来到自己脸上。还有些电视里的家伙,他们怎么就那么开心:那个苏打水广告的演员,他们哪来那么多激情?你看到吗?“我们有苏打水,我们有苏打水,我们有苏打水”,蹦蹦跳跳、欢乐无边,在半空中飞翔——一罐苏打水。你有没有站在那儿,看着电视里头和你手中一样的饮料,画面里尽是排球扣杀、水上摩托艇、比基尼女郎;而你站在那里没有任何这种感觉:(你会想,可能我放太多冰了)
Monk's Diner, day. George and Jerry enter. George is excited:
(餐厅,乔治、杰瑞进,乔治很兴奋。)
George: So then, as we were leaving, we were just kind of standing there, and she was sort of smiling at me, and I wasn't sure if she wanted me to ask her out, because when women smile at me I don't know what it means. Sometimes I interpret it like they're Psychotic or something and I don't know if I'm
supposed to smile back, I don't know what to do. So I just stood there like - remember how Quayle looked when Benson gave him that Kennedy line? - that's what I looked like.
乔治:嗯当时,我们要离开,我们就站在那里,她好像在对我微笑,我不确定她是不是想我约她出去,因为每当有女人对我微笑我都不知道这意味着什么。有时我会理解为她们是不是疯了还是怎么着,反正我就不确定我是不是应该也回敬一个微笑,不知道该怎么办。所以我就站在那里——(这段有点背景,我不清楚)就好像本森要抛出他的肯尼迪问题时奎耶尔看他的表情——就是我看起来的样子。
Jerry: So you didn't ask?
杰瑞:也就是说你没有约她?
George: No, I froze.
乔治:没有,我傻了。
Jerry: (Points to counter) Counter.
杰瑞:(指着柜台)柜台。
George: Oh yeah. So wait, wait. A half-hour later I'm back in the office, I tell Lloyd the whole story. He says "So why don't you call her". I says "I can't." I couldn't, I couldn't do it right then. For me to ask a woman out I gotta get into a mental state like the karate guys before they break the bricks. So Lloyd calls me a wuss.
乔治:哦,是的。等等,等等。半小时后我回到办公室,我把这事告诉劳伊德了。他说:“你干嘛不给她电话呢?”。我说“我不能,我不能马上这么办。对我来说,要约个女生出来,就好像练空手道的人要劈砖前一样,要凝神静气的准备一番。所以劳伊德骂我是个怂人。”
Jerry: He said wuss?
杰瑞:他说“怂人”?
George: Yeah. Anyway, he shamed me into it.
乔治:是啊,反正他让我很羞愧。
Jerry: So you called. (They sit at counter)
杰瑞:那你打电话了。(他们坐下)
George: Right. And, and to cover my nervousness I started eating an apple, because I think if they hear you chewing on the other end of the phone, it makes you sound casual.
乔治:是的。而且为了掩饰我的不安,我开始吃苹果,因为我认为如果人家听到你在电话这头咀嚼的声音,他们会认为你听起来很随意。
Jerry: Yeah, like a farm boy.
杰瑞:可不是吗,就像个农家男孩。
George: Right. So I call her up, I tell her it's me, she gives me an enthusiastic 'Hi!'
乔治:是的。所以我给她电话啦,我说是我,她给了我一句热情四溢的“嗨”。
Jerry: Wow. Enthusiastic 'Hi!', that's beautiful.
杰瑞:喔!热情四溢的“嗨”,美死你啦。
George: Oh, I don't get the enthusiastic 'Hi!', I'm outta there.
乔治:哦,要不是这声“嗨”,我才不搭理呢。
Jerry: Alright, so you're chewing your apple, you got your enthusiastic 'Hi!' Go ahead.
杰瑞:那好吧,你就嚼着你的苹果,听到一声热情的“嗨”,继续说……
George: So, we're talking, and I don't like to go too long before I ask them out, I wanna get it over with right away, so I just blurt out "What are you doing Saturday night?"
乔治:所以我们开始聊,我不想在约她出来之前罗嗦太久,我想马上处理完,我就脱口而出“你周六晚上有啥安排没有?”
Jerry: And?
杰瑞:然后呢?
George: She bought.
乔治:她答应了。
Jerry: Great day in the morning.
杰瑞:可真是清新美好的一天。
George: Then I got off the phone right away.
乔治:然后我就立马挂断电话啦。
Jerry: Sure, it's like robbing a bank: you don't loiter around in front of the teller holding that big bag of money. You come in, you hit and get out.
杰瑞:是啊。这就像抢银行:你可不会提溜着那一大袋子抢来的钱,在柜员面前晃悠。你进来,抢完走人。
George: It's amazing: we, we both have dates on the same night. I can't remember the last time that happened.
乔治:真是奇妙:我们,我和你在同一晚都有约会,我都想不起来上一次发生类似事件的时候了。
 
George's car, parked outside apartment building, night. George and his date Carol:
(乔治的车,停在公寓外,夜里,乔治和他的约会对象卡罗尔)
George: I can't stand doing laundry. That's why I have forty pairs of underwear.
乔治:我讨厌洗衣服。所以我有40套内衣。
Carol: You do not.
卡罗尔:你不会吧?
George: Absolutely. Because instead of doing a wash, I just keep buying underwear. My goal is to have over three hundred and sixty pair. That way, I only have to do wash once a year.
乔治:千真万确。与其去洗,我还不如一直不停的买内衣。我的目标就是拥有超过360条内裤。那样的话,我一年只需要洗一次衣服。
(They both laugh)
(两人笑)
Jerry's car, also parked outside an apartment building. Jerry and his girlfriend Donna:
(杰瑞的车,也是公寓外,杰瑞和女友唐娜)
Jerry: (In awful Scots/Irish accent) Come on, try it. Let me hear you try a Scottish accent.
杰瑞:(用糟糕的苏格兰/爱尔兰口音)来吧,试试看,我想听听你用苏格兰口音说话。
Donna: That's Irish.
唐娜:那是爱尔兰。
Jerry: Irish, Scottish, what's the difference, lassie?
杰瑞:爱尔兰、苏格兰,有啥区别?
(Donna laughs)
(唐娜笑)
 
Back to George and Carol:
(回到乔治和卡罗尔)
Donna: So, er, thanks for dinner. It was great.
唐娜:那么,额,谢谢请我晚餐啦。很棒。
George: Yeah. We should do this again.
乔治:是啊,我们真该再出来一起吃饭。
Donna: Would you like to come upstairs for some coffee?
唐娜:你想上楼来喝点咖啡不?
George: Oh, no, thanks. I can't drink coffee late at night, it keeps me up.
乔治:哦,不,谢谢。我晚上不能喝咖啡,会让人失眠。
Donna: (Looks disappointed) So, um, OK.
唐娜:(看起来很失望)那么,好吧。
George: OK.
乔治:好。
Donna: Goodnight.
唐娜:晚安。
George: Yeah, take it easy.
乔治:嗯,再会。
(Donna leaves car. George realizes what he has done and bashes his forehead in disgust)
(唐娜离开车,乔治意识到自己犯了愚蠢的错误,猛击自己的头部)
 
Back to Jerry and Donna:
(回到杰瑞和唐娜)
Donna: Thanks again for the movie.
唐娜:谢谢请我看电影。
Jerry: You're welcome.
杰瑞:不客气。
Donna: I'd invite you up, but the place is being painted.
唐娜:我该请你上楼的,不过我那儿正在装修。
Jerry: Oh, that's OK.
杰瑞:哦,没事。
Donna: Unless you want to go to your place.
唐娜:除非你想回你的住处。
Jerry: OK, but there's no cake or anything, if that's what you're looking for.
杰瑞:好啊,那里可没有蛋糕或什么的,如果你是想要寻找这个的话。
 
Back to George, driving, looking frustrated:
(回到乔治,开车,看起来很沮丧)
George: Take it easy, huh, take it easy.
乔治:再见,呵呵,再会。
 
Jerry's apartment. Jerry and Donna sit on the sofa:
(杰瑞的住所,杰瑞和唐娜坐在沙发)
Jerry: I think if one's going to kill oneself, the least you could do is leave a note - it's common courtesy. I don't know, that's just the way I was brought up.
杰瑞:我认为一个人如果要自杀的话,至少他应该留个遗言啥的——这是基本的礼节礼貌。说不清楚,可能只是我这么认为吧。
Donna: Values are very important.
唐娜:信念很重要。
Jerry: Oh, so important. So what are you doing Thursday night - you wanna have dinner?
杰瑞:哦,很重要。你周四晚上干嘛呢——要不一起吃个饭?
Donna: Thursday's great. (Moves closer)
唐娜:周四,行啊。(靠近)
Jerry: (Looks at his pants) Tan pants. Why do I buy tan pants, Donna? I don't feel comfortable in them.
杰瑞:(看着自己的裤子)鞣皮裤子,我干嘛买这东西,唐娜。穿着一点都不舒服。
Donna: Are those Cotton Dockers?
唐娜:这是棉制的度雅仕牛仔吗?
Jerry: Oh, I can't begin to tell you how much I hate that commercial.
杰瑞:哦,我都不想告诉你我有多讨厌那个广告。
Donna: Really? I like that commercial. (Jerry pauses)
唐娜:真的?我喜欢那个广告片。(杰瑞停了)
Jerry: You like that commercial?
杰瑞:你喜欢那个?
Donna: Yeah, it's clever.
唐娜:是啊,很不错。
Jerry: Now wait a second, you mean the one where the guys are all standing around, supposedly being very casual and witty?
杰瑞:等等,你说的是那个:所有人都站在一圈,装作很随意、很机灵的样子?
Donna: Yeah, that's the one.
唐娜:是,就是这个。
Jerry: What could you possibly like about that?
杰瑞:你怎么会喜欢这个的?
Donna: I don't know, I like the guys.
唐娜:我不知道,我喜欢那些人。
Jerry: Yeah, they're so funny and so comfortable with each other, and I could be comfortable too, if I had pants like that. I could sit on a porch and wrestle around, and maybe even be part of a real bull session.
杰瑞:是啊,他们很风趣也很和谐,如果我有那种裤子我也会很舒适的。我能坐在门槛,肆意磨蹭,甚至能加入到闲聊中去。
Donna: Hey, I know guys like that. To me the dialogue rings true.
唐娜:嗨,我知道这种人,对我来说对话听起来挺真实的。
Jerry: (Shrugs. Pause) Even if the dialogue did ring true. Even if somehow somewhere men actually talk like that, what does that have to do with the pants? Doesn't that bother you?
杰瑞:(耸肩,暂停)就算对话听起来是真的,就算某时、某地男人的确是这么说话的,可这些跟裤子有什么关系呢?这很影响你吗?
Donna: (Increasingly annoyed) That's the idea. That's what's clever about it, that they're not talking about the pants.
唐娜:(越来越不耐烦的样子)这就是点子啊,也就是我觉得这广告灵的地方,就是因为他们不聊裤子。
Jerry: But they're talking about nothing.
杰瑞:可是他们不知所云啊。
Donna: That's the point.
唐娜:这就是好的地方!
Jerry: I know the point.
杰瑞:我不知道什么好的。
Donna: No one is telling you to like it.
唐娜:没人强求你喜欢啊。
Jerry: I mean, all those quick shots of the pants, just pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants, pants. What is that supposed to be?
杰瑞:我是说,那些快速闪过的镜头,都是关于裤子的,裤子、裤子、裤子,这算是啥意思呀?
(Donna sighs, leans away from Jerry, looks at watch)
(唐娜无语,远离杰瑞,看表)
 
Jerry monologue:
(杰瑞独白)
What's brutal about the date is the scrutiny that you put each other through. Because whenever you think about this person in terms of the future, you have to magnify everything about them. You know, like the guy'll be like 'I don't think her eyebrows are even. Could I look at uneven eyebrows for the
rest of my life?' And of course the woman's looking at the guy, thinking 'What is he looking at? Do I want somebody looking at me like this for the rest of my life?'
约会最残酷的事情就是两个人要经历痛苦的仔细审查的过程。因为但凡你要去思索一个人的将来,你必须把他的每件事情都放大来看。你知道的,就好像说这兄弟的眉毛貌似不齐啊。我能不能忍受一辈子都看着这样的眉毛呢?当然这个女人注视着这个男人,想:他在看着什么呀?我是否需要有个人像这样看着我一辈子呢?
 
Jerry's apartment, day. Jerry and Elaine:
(杰瑞住处,日间,杰瑞和依莲)
Jerry: I'm supposed to see her again on Thursday, but can I go out with someone who actually likes this commercial?
杰瑞:我们本来约好周四再见的,不过我真的能和一个这么喜欢那广告片的人出去约会吗?
Elaine: I once broke up with a guy because he didn't keep his bathroom clean enough.
依莲:我有一次和一个男生分手只是因为他不能保持盥洗室的清洁。
Jerry: No kidding. Did you tell him that was the reason?
杰瑞:不会吧。那你有把这个原因告诉他吗?
Elaine: Oh yeah, I told him all the time. You would not have believed his tub: germs were building a town in there - they were constructing offices. Houses near the drain were going for $150,000.
依莲:哦当然,我一直跟他说的。你无法想像他的浴缸:细菌都可以在那里盖一座城池了——它们在盖楼呢。水管旁边的房子卖到15万。
(George enters, looking miserable, holding a brown paper bag)
(乔治进,看起来很悲惨,拿着棕色的纸袋)
Elaine: Hi.
依莲:嗨。
(George produces Pepto-Bismol bottle and box of bicarb from bag, places them on counter)
(乔治拿出一罐佩托比斯摩和一盒小苏打,放到柜台)
Jerry: You're still thinking about this?
杰瑞:你还在想这些呢?
George: (While preparing bicarb) She invites me up at twelve o clock at night, for coffee. And I don't go up. "No thank you, I don't want coffee, it keeps me up. Too late for me to drink coffee." I said this to her. People this stupid shouldn't be allowed to live. I can't imagine what she must think of me.
乔治:(准备小苏打时)她夜里12点邀请我,去喝咖啡。我不想去,我说:不了,谢谢,我不要咖啡,这会让我睡不着。现在喝咖啡对我来说太晚了。我居然对她说这个。像我这么蠢的人都不该活着。
Jerry: She thinks you're a guy that doesn't like coffee.
杰瑞:她不过就认为你不是个喜欢咖啡的人罢了。
George: She invited me up. Coffee's not coffee, coffee is sex.
乔治:她邀请我上去。醉翁之意不在酒!
Elaine: Maybe coffee was coffee.
依莲:可能只是咖啡而已。
George: Coffee's coffee in the morning, it's not coffee at twelve o clock at night.
乔治:在早晨,咖啡就是咖啡;在午夜12点,咖啡就不只是咖啡而已!
Elaine: Well some people drink coffee that late.
依莲:可是就有很多人在深夜喝咖啡的啊。
George: Yeah, people who work at NORAD, who're on twenty-four hour missile watch. Everything was going along so great: she was laughing, I was funny. I kept saying to myself "Keep it up, don't blow it, you're doing great."
乔治:是啊,那些在北美空防司令部工作的人,那些24小时负责观测导弹行踪的人(才这样)。万事俱备:她很开心的笑,我很搞笑。我不住的对自己说:保持住啊,别搞砸啦,你做得很棒。
Elaine: It's all in your head. All she knows is she had a good time. I think you should call her.
依莲:这些都只是在你脑子里而已,她所知道的就是她和你度过了欢乐的时光,我认为你还是要给她电话。
George: I can't call her now, it's too soon. I'm planning a Wednesday call.
乔治:我现在不能给她电话,太快了。我在筹备周三给她电话。
Elaine: Oh, why? I love it when guys call me the next day.
依莲:哦,为啥?我喜欢男人第二天就给我电话。
George: Of course you do, but you're imagining a guy you like, not a guy who goes (in stupid voice) "Oh no, I don't drink coffee late at night." If I call her now, she's gonna think I'm too needy. Women don't wanna see need. They want a take-charge guy - a colonel, a kaiser, a tsar.
乔治:你当然喜欢,不过你只是在想像一个你喜欢的男人,他这么说话(用傻气的语调)哦,不,我晚上不喝咖啡。如果我现在给她电话,她会认为我太饥渴了。女人不想看到露骨的需要,她们想看到一个负责的男人——上校、凯撒、沙皇。
Elaine: All she'll think is that you like her.
依莲:她知道的只是你喜欢她。
George: Yes, she wants me to like her, if she likes me, but she doesn't like me!
乔治:是的,她希望我喜欢她,如果她也喜欢我的话,可她并不喜欢我啊!
Elaine: I don't know what your parents did to you.
依莲:真不知道你父母对你做了些什么。
(Kramer enters, points at Jerry)
(克雷默进,指着杰瑞)
Kramer: Hey, I just thought of a really funny thing for your act. Alright, you're up there, you're on the stage and you go "Hey, you ever notice how cars here in New York, they never get out of the way of ambulances anymore. Someone's in a life-and-death situation, and we're thinking 'Well, sorry buddy,
you should've thought of that when you were eating cheese omelettes and sauages for breakfast every morning for the last thirty years.'" So you gonna use it?
克雷默:嗨,我刚想到一个很好玩的笑料供你演出用。听着,你在那里站着,在舞台上你说:嗨,你们有注意到纽约的路况吗,汽车在路上再也不为救护车让道了。有人正处在生死边缘,我们却琢磨着:好吧,不好意思,当你吃奶酪蛋饼的早餐、一吃就是30年时,你就该想到会有今天。你会用这个段子吗?
Jerry: I don't think so.
杰瑞:我想不会吧。
Kramer: It's funny.
克雷默:这很有趣啊。
Elaine: It is funny.
依莲:是很有趣。
Kramer: That's as good as anything you do.
克雷默:这和你的其他段子一样精彩啊。
George: Alright, I gotta make a call. Everybody out, come on.
乔治:好吧,我去打电话。大家都出去吧,走起来……
Jerry: Why do we have to leave?
杰瑞:为什么我们要离开?
George: Because I can't call a woman with other people in the room. Come on, let's go.
乔治:因为我不能当着满屋子的人的面给一个女人打电话,所以走你们的!
Elaine: Oh, see, this is the problem.
依莲:哦,看吧,这可是个大问题。
Jerry: You're kicking me out of my house?
杰瑞:你把我踢出我自己的屋子??
George: Yes.
乔治:是的。
Elaine: Don't forget.
依莲:别忘了。
George: Oh Jerry, do you have any apples?
乔治:哦,杰瑞,你有苹果不?
Jerry: Don't do the apples. That's enough already with the apples.
杰瑞:别再这么苹果了,它们已经受够了!
(Elaine, Kramer and Jerry leave. George removes jacket, dials phone)
(依莲、克雷默和杰瑞离开,乔治脱外套,打电话)
Phone: Hi, it's Carol, I 'll get back to you. (Beep)
电话:嗨,这里是卡罗尔,请留言,我回头打给你。
George: Uhm, hi, it's George, George Costanza, remember me? The guy that didn't come up for coffee.
You see, I didn't realise that coffee didn't really mean ... well, whatever. Anyway, it was fun. It was, erm, it was fun, so, oh boy, uhm, so, you call me back. If you want, it's up to you, you know, whatever you wanna do. Either way. The ball's in your court. So, er, take it easy.
乔治:嗯,嗨,我是乔治,乔治.康斯坦茨,记得我吗?就是那个不肯上楼喝咖啡的家伙。你知道嘛,我其实没有意识到咖啡不仅仅意味着……嗯,好吧,不管怎么说,和你一起很开心。额……曾经很开心,那么,嗯,你会给我回电吧。如果你想的话,这都取决于你,你知道的,随便你怎么做。决定权在你手中。那么……再会了。
(Hangs up. Jerry enters)
(挂断,杰瑞进)
Jerry: I'm just gonna get my jacket, I'll meet you downstairs. What's the matter, did you call?
杰瑞:我只是来取我的外套,我们楼下见,怎么回事?你打过电话啦?
(Elaine enters)
(依莲进)
George: Got her machine. I'm dead, I'm a dead man. That's it. I'm dead, I'm a dead man. Dead man.
乔治:我打到她的语音信箱。我死了,我完蛋了。结束了。我死定了!!!死人一个……
Jerry: What did you say?
杰瑞:你说什么了?
George: I don't know what the hell I said. I gave her an ultimatum and there's nothing I can do. It's a machine. The little light is blinking right now: 'Come and listen to the idiot. Hey everybody, the idiot's on!'
乔治:我不知道我说了什么鬼话。我给她最后通牒我却无能为力。这是个机器!那盏小灯正在不停闪烁:来吧,来听听这傻瓜说的吧,嗨,大家好,傻瓜电台开始播音。
Jerry: After one date you try and improvise on her machine?
杰瑞:才约会一次,你就开始在她的答录机上作即兴演出了?!
George: Now I'm in the worst position of all.
乔治:我现在是在最尴尬的境地了。
Elaine: Y'know, my brother-in-law once left a message on this guy's machine, and he blurted out some business information he wasn't supposed to, and it would have cost him $15,000, so he waited outside the guy's house and when the guy came home he went upstairs with him and he switched the tape.
依莲:你知道吗,我的姐(妹)夫有次在一个家伙的答录机上留言,他不小心泄露了一些不该外传的商业信息,这有可能会让他赔上1万5千美元,所以他等在那个人的屋外,等那家伙上楼时,他赶紧替换了磁带。
George: He did that?
乔治:他真这么干了?!
Elaine: Yeah.
依莲:可不是吗。
George: Somebody did that?
乔治:有人这么干了?
Jerry: She'll call you back. You're overreacting.
杰瑞:她会给你回电的,你别大惊小怪的。
 
Jerry's apartment. Jerry and Donna:
(杰瑞家,杰瑞和唐娜)
Jerry: Not once.
杰瑞:一次都没有。
Donna: Never?
唐娜:从没有过?
Jerry: I have never seen one episode of 'I Love Lucy' in my life ever.
杰瑞:我这辈子没看过一集“我爱露西”。
Donna: That's amazing.
唐娜:这可真特别。
Jerry: Thank you.
杰瑞:谢谢你。
Donna: Is there anything else about you I should know?
唐娜:你还有什么特别的我应该知道的吗?
Jerry: Yes, I'm lactose intolerant.
杰瑞:是的,我有乳糖不耐受症。
Donna: Really?
唐娜:真的?
Jerry: I have no patience for lactose. And I won't stand for it. Uhm, I'll be right back. (Goes to bathroom)
杰瑞:我对乳糖没有耐心,我无法忍受这个。嗯,我马上回来。(去洗手间)
(George enters)
(乔治进)
George: Wait till you hear this (sees Donna). Whoa, ah, I'm sorry, I didn't, I had no idea. (Goes to leave)
乔治:你听听这个(看见唐娜)。哦,啊,不好意思,我不知道,我没想到……(准备离开)
Donna: Wait, wait. He's in the bathroom.
唐娜:等等,他在洗手间。
George: I just wanted to talk to him for a minute, but I'll come back.
乔治:我只是想跟他说句话,我马上回来。
Donna: You don't have to leave.
唐娜:你不用回避的。
George: You sure?
乔治:你确定?
Donna: Yes.
唐娜:是的。
George: OK.
乔治:那好吧。
Donna: I'm Donna.
唐娜:我是唐娜。
George: Donna. Oh, you're the one that likes that commercial!
乔治:唐娜,哦,你就是喜欢那个广告片的人。
Donna: He told you about that.
唐娜:他跟你说过这事了。
George: No, he, he didn't actually tell me that, uh, we were talking about that commercial, in fact I think I brought it up because I like that commercial. No, he, he would never tell me anything like that. He never discusses anything. He's, he's like a clam. You're not gonna mention this, to him.. (Jerry re-enters)
乔治:没有,他,实际上他并没有告诉我,额,我们谈起那个广告片来着,我说起这个是因为其实我喜欢那个片子。不,他,他才不会跟我说起这种事呢。他从不和我探讨任何事情。他,他是个沉默寡言的家伙,你不会对他提起这个吧……(杰瑞进)
Donna: (To Jerry) So you go around telling your friends I'm not hip because I like that commercial.
唐娜:(对杰瑞)看起来你经常跟你的朋友们掰扯我不时髦就是因为我不喜欢那个广告片。
Jerry: What? (To George) What did, what did you say?
杰瑞:什么?(对乔治)你,说什么了?
George: Say? What? Nothing, I..
乔治:说?什么?没有啊,我……
Donna: You told him how I like the commercial.
唐娜:你跟他说我喜欢那个广告片。
Jerry: Well, so what if I said that?
杰瑞:好吧,我说过又怎样?
Donna: Well, so, you didn't have to tell your friends.
唐娜:你不需要去告诉你的朋友吧。
Jerry: No, I had to tell my friends, my friends didn't have to tell you.
杰瑞:不,我必须得告诉我的朋友们,我的朋友们没必要再转告你。
George: (To Donna) Why did you have to get me in trouble?
乔治:(对唐娜)为什么你要陷我于不仁不义?
Donna: I don't like you talking about me with your friends behind my back.
唐娜:我不喜欢你和你的朋友们在我的背后议论我。
George: Boy oh boy.
乔治:妈妈咪呀……
Jerry: I said I couldn't believe you liked that commercial. So what?
杰瑞:我说过我不敢相信你喜欢那个广告片,怎么啦!
Donna: I asked some friends of mine this week, and all of them liked the commercial.
唐娜:这周我问起过我的一些朋友,他们全都喜欢那个片子。
Jerry: Boy, I bet you got a regular Algonquin round table there.
杰瑞:老天啊,你们是不是有个嚼舌根的下三滥小团体啊?
注:Algonquin round table——指一圈喜欢恶意指摘、挑剔、下三滥的人
(Kramer enters)
(克雷默进)
K:Hey.
克雷默:嗨。
Jerry: Oh, Kramer, this is Donna.
杰瑞:哦,克雷默,这是唐娜。
k Oh. Cotton Dockers!
克雷默:哦,牛仔裤广告!
George: Hello! Alright, we should be going. Come on .(Grabs Kramer)
乔治:喂!好吧,我们真的该走了。走你!(抓住克雷默)
k What? Where are we going?
克雷默:怎么啦?我们去哪儿?
George: Come on!
乔治:走就是了!
Donna: Don't bother, I'm leaving.
唐娜:你们省省吧,我走了。
Jerry: Donna, really, you're making too much of this.
杰瑞:唐娜,说真的,你别太小题大做了。
K One hundred percent Cotton Dockers, if they're not Dockers, they're just pants!
克雷默:100%纯棉度雅士牌,如果不是度雅士,那不就只是裤子!
Jerry: Please, Donna.
杰瑞:拜托了,唐娜。
Donna: I don't wanna hear it.(Leaves)
唐娜:我不想听到这些。(离开)
George: I can't believe I said that. You know me, I'm a vault.
乔治:不敢相信我说了这些,你知道我的,我就是个棒槌。
Jerry: Don't worry about it, it wasn't working anyway.
杰瑞:别担心这个,反正我和她没结果的。
k What happened there?
克雷默:出什么事了?
Jerry: I'll tell you later.
杰瑞:等会告诉你。
George: You are not gonna believe what's going on with this woman.
乔治:你不会相信这女人出什么事了。
Monk's Diner. George and Jerry sat in booth:
(蒙克餐馆,乔治杰瑞坐着)
George: OK, so you remember I made the initial call Sunday, she doesn't call back. I call again Monday, I leave another message. I call Tuesday, I get the machine again: "I know you're there, I don't know what your story is." Yesterday, I'm a volcano - I try one more call, the machine comes on, and fly like Mussolini from the balcony- "Where the hell do you get the nerve? You invite me up for coffee and then you don't call me back for four days? I don't like coffee, I don't have to come up. I'd like to get one more shot at the coffee just so I could spit it in your face."
乔治:好吧,你记得我周日打过一个电话嘛,她没有给我回电。我周一又打了,留了另一通言。周二打电话,还是答录机,我就说:我知道你在那里,我不知道你在想什么。昨天,我怒了,我又打了,又TMD是答录机,我怒发冲冠,就这么吼着:你TMD好大的胆子!你邀请我去你家喝咖啡,然后连续4天不回我电话?我不喜欢咖啡,我没必要上去吧。我好想再喝一杯咖啡,这样我就可以吐在你的脸上!
Jerry: You said that?
杰瑞:你这么说的?
George: I lost it.
乔治:我失去理智了。
Jerry: I can't blame you. I can't believe she never called you back.
杰瑞:也不能怪你。我也不相信她居然一直没给你回电。
George: She did. Today.
乔治:她回了,今天。
Jerry: What?
杰瑞:什么?
George: She called my office. She said she's been in the Hamptons since Sunday. She didn't know if I was trying to get in touch with her. Her machine broke, and she's been using her old machine and she doesn't have the beeper for it.
乔治:她给我办公室来电。她说她从周日起就在汉普顿,她不知道我是否在尝试着和她联系。她的答录机坏了,她在用老的答录机,没有一个留言。
Jerry: So she didn't get the messages.
杰瑞:就是说她没有听到你的留言。
George: Exactly, but they're on there waiting. She said she can't wait to see me, we're having dinner tonight. She's supposed to call me as soon as she gets home.
乔治:是啊,但是那些留言都存着呢,她说等不及想见我,我们今晚共进晚餐。她一到家就会给我电话的。
Jerry: But what about the messages?
杰瑞:那些留言怎么办?
(George produces cassette tape from pocket)
(乔治从口袋中拿出磁带)
Jerry: Elaine's thing? How you gonna get in?
杰瑞:依莲的故事?可你怎么到她家呢?
George: I'll meet her outside the building.
杰瑞:我会在她住处外见她。
Jerry: But you know as soon as she gets in the apartment she's going right for that machine.
杰瑞:可她一回到住所,不就会奔向答录机嘛?
George: Or she goes for the bathroom. That's my only chance. Who am I kidding? I can't do this, I can't do this. I don't even know how to work those stupid machines.
乔治:她可以先去洗手间啊。这是我唯一的机会。我在瞎扯什么呢,我不能这么做,我做不来这个。我连怎么操作那该死的答录机都不会。
Jerry: There's nothing to it. You lift the lid, it comes right out.
杰瑞:没什么啊,你打开机器,拿出磁带就好了。
George: You do it for me.
乔治:你给我做做看。
Jerry: What?
杰瑞:什么?
George: Come on, it'll be so much easier.
乔治:你就帮帮忙吧,会容易很多的。
Jerry: How you gonna get me up there?
杰瑞:你打算怎么把我带过去?
George: I'll tell her I bumped into you, I'm giving you a ride uptown.
乔治:我会跟她说我碰到你了,然后我开车带你去城里。
Jerry: And who makes the switch?
杰瑞:谁去操作机器?
George: You do.
乔治:你啊。
Jerry: I do.
杰瑞:我做?
George: I can't do it. I'll, I'll keep her busy.
乔治:我不会操作啊,我会,我去牵制住她。
Jerry: I can't get involved in this.
杰瑞:我不能趟这浑水。
George: I think I may be in love with this woman.
乔治:我想我是爱上这女人了。
Jerry: What if she sees me?
杰瑞:要是她发现我了怎么办?
George: Oh, you are such a wuss.
乔治:哦,你真是个孬种。
Jerry: A wuss?
杰瑞:孬种?
George: Yeah.
乔治:是的。
Jerry: Did you call me a wuss?
杰瑞:你叫我孬种??
 
Outside apartment building, night. George and Jerry are sat on a low wall:
(公寓外,夜,乔治和杰瑞坐在低墙上)
George: Well there is traffic. It might take her till eight-fifteen.
乔治:路况不太好,她大概要8点15左右到。
Jerry: I got one problem: you're keeping her busy in the other room. Now, what if she somehow gets away from you and is coming in? You have to signal me that she's coming.
杰瑞:我有个问题,你在一个房间里把她缠住,要是她摆脱你了,冲过来怎么办?你得给我个信号啥的吧。
George: A signal, right, erm, OK, er OK, the signal is, I'll call out 'Tippy toe!'
乔治:信号,好的,行。信号就是……我会大叫“脚趾头”。
Jerry: 'Tippy Toe?' I don't think so.
杰瑞:“脚趾头”?不会吧!
George: You don't like 'Tippy toe?'
乔治:你不喜欢“脚趾头”?
Jerry: No 'Tippy toe.'
杰瑞:不要“脚趾头”。
George: Alright, er, OK I got it, erm, I'll sing.
乔治:好吧,额,我有了,那我就唱歌。
Jerry: What song?
杰瑞:哪首歌?
George: Erm, 'How do you solve a problem like Maria?'
乔治:额,“怎样像玛利亚一样解决问题?”
Jerry: What is that?
杰瑞:这是什么鬼歌?
George: Oh, it's a lovely song. (Sings) How do you solve a problem like Maria?
乔治:哦,这是首很好的歌。(唱)怎样像玛利亚一样解决问题?
Jerry: Anything else?
杰瑞:还有别的什么吗?
George: You pick it.
乔治:你选吧。
Jerry: 'Lemon Tree'
杰瑞:柠檬树。
George: Peter, Paul and Mary.
乔治:彼得,保罗和玛莉。
Jerry: No, Trini Lopez.
杰瑞:不,特立尼.洛佩兹。
Both: (Singing) Lemon tree very pretty and a lemon flower
俩人:(唱)柠檬树和柠檬花儿多美丽。
George: You got the tape?
乔治:磁带准备好了吧?
Jerry: (Produces tapes) Standard. Micro.
杰瑞:(拿出磁带)标准的。
George: How do you feel? Confident?
乔治:你什么感觉?自信?
Jerry: Feel good.
杰瑞:我感觉很好。
George: You nervous?
乔治:你紧张吗?
Jerry: Not at all.
杰瑞:一点都不。
George: Get up, get up, it's her. Oh, the hell with this, I'm scared to death, just walk away, it's off, cancel everything, go!
乔治:起来,起来,她来了。哦,我死翘翘了。我怕得要死,我们走吧,行动取消,取消!走!
(Carol arrives)
(卡罗尔到)
George: Hey! What are you doing here? I thought I was supposed to call you when I got home.
乔治:嗨!你在干啥?我还想回家再给你电话的呢。
George: I, I couldn't wait. I was too anxious to see you.
乔治:我,我等不及了。我太想见你了。
Carol: Oh, that's so sweet.
卡罗尔:哦,你嘴真甜。
George: Oh, this is my friend, Jerry Seinfeld. I just bumped into him around the corner. Isn't that a coincidence? The funny thing is, I see him all the time.
乔治:哦,这是我朋友,杰瑞.宋飞。碰巧在街角遇见他,真是巧了。更搞笑的是,我几乎一直看见他。
Jerry: All the time.
杰瑞:一直。
Carol: It's nice to meet you.
卡罗尔:很高兴见到你。
Jerry: Hi.
杰瑞:嗨!
Carol: So, I'm starving. Where are we gonna eat?
卡罗尔:嗯,我很饿了,我们去哪儿吃饭呢?
George: You know, we could go uptown, and that way we could give Jerry a ride home.
乔治:嗯,我们可以去中心城区,顺便可以送杰瑞回家。
Carol: OK. Let's go, I'm ready, where'd you park?
卡罗尔:好的,我们走,你车停哪里?
George: Don't you wanna go upstairs first?
乔治:你不想先上楼一下?
Carol: No, what for? I'll just give my bag to the doorman.
卡罗尔:不,去干嘛?我只要把我的包包给门卫就行了。
Jerry: You know, I really need to use the bathroom.
杰瑞:不好意思,我真的需要用一下洗手间。
Carol: Oh well there's a bathroom in the coffee shop just next door.
卡罗尔:哦,隔壁有间咖啡馆就有洗手间的。
George: Yes, yes, but er, I have to make a call, so...
乔治:是的是的,不过,我得打个电话,所以……
Carol: Well they have a phone.
卡罗尔:哦,(咖啡馆)也有电话的。
(George takes Carol to one side)
(乔治把卡罗尔拉到一边)
George: I know Jerry. He has this phobia about public toilets. I think we really should go upstairs.
乔治:我了解杰瑞。他对公用厕所有种恐惧症。我想我们真得上楼一趟。
Carol: (Aloud) You know, I think I will go upstairs. I can check my machine.
卡罗尔:(大声)你知道的,我想我是得上楼一下,我可以看看我的答录机。
George: Right, right.
乔治:好的,好的。
(They enter building)
(他们进入大楼)
 
Inside Carol's apartment. Carol, Jerry and George enter:
(卡罗尔家,卡罗尔、杰瑞和乔治进)
Carol: The bathroom's on the hall to the right.
卡罗尔:洗手间在过道往右。
Jerry: Er, you know, why don't you go first, you just had a long trip.
杰瑞:额,我想还是你先去吧,你刚度过长途旅行。
Carol: No, I'm fine.
卡罗尔:不用,我没事。
Jerry: Uhmmm, you know, it's the damnedest thing, it went away.
杰瑞:额,最尴尬的事情是,我不用(上厕所)了。
Carol: Oh that's weird.
卡罗尔:哦,真是奇了怪啦。
George: No, no that can happen. I've, er, I've read about that in medical journals. It's a freak thing, but...
乔治:不,这是可能发生的。我在医学杂志看到这种事情,很奇怪可是……
Carol: Well, let me just check my messages, and we'll go.
卡罗尔:那么,我就去检查一下我的答录机,我们就走。
George: Uh, Carol, can I talk to you for a second? Right now.
乔治:哦,卡罗尔,我能跟你说句话吗?就现在。
Carol: Sure.
卡罗尔:当然。
George: Please, this is very, very important. (Leads her to other room)
乔治:这,这事非同小可。(把她领到另一间房)
(Jerry goes over to machine to switch tape)
(杰瑞去答录机,替换磁带)
George: (Shouts from other room) Uhh, tippy toe! Tippy toe! Lemon tree!
乔治:(大声吼)哦,脚趾头!脚趾头!柠檬树!
(Carol reappears followed by George)
(卡罗尔跟随乔治出现)
Carol: (To Jerry) Now I know who you are. You're a comedian. I've seen you, it's driving me crazy.
卡罗尔:(对杰瑞)我现在反应过来你是谁了,你是那个喜剧演员。我见过你,你的表演让人疯狂。
Jerry: Right. I am.
杰瑞:可不是嘛,呵呵。
George: Carol, that's so rude. Please, I'm serious, just for a moment, if you wouldn't mind, and then we'll talk to Jerry.
乔治:卡罗尔,这可真不礼貌。请你,我认真的,就一会儿,你不介意的话,然后我们再和杰瑞聊天。
(George leads Carol back out, Jerry switches tapes)
(乔治带领卡罗尔回去,杰瑞换磁带)
Jerry: (Shouts) Hey you two. I'm ready to go.
杰瑞:(大喊)嗨你们俩,我准备好走了。
(George and Carol return)
(乔治和卡罗尔回来)
Carol: That's what you had to tell me? Your father wears sneakers in the pool?
卡罗尔:你就想告诉我这个?你老爸在泳池里穿跑鞋?
George: (To Jerry) Don't you find that strange?
乔治:(对杰瑞)你不觉得这奇怪嘛?
Jerry: Yes.
杰瑞:是的。
Carol: Well, I'll just check my machine and we'll go. No, nothing here, let's go. Oh, I forgot to tell you. After I talked to you today my neighbour called me and played my messages to me over the phone.
卡罗尔:好吧,我去看看我的答录机我们就走。哦,啥都没有,我们走吧。哦,我忘了告诉你今天和你电话后,我邻居给我打电话然后给我听留言。
George: Oh, uhhh...
乔治:哦,哦……
Carol: Yours were hilarious, we were both cracking up. I just love jokes like that.
卡罗尔:你的留言真搞笑,我们都笑翻了。我喜欢这种笑话。
(All three leave)
(离场)
 
Jerry's closing monologue:
杰瑞的结尾独白:
I love my phone machine. I wish I was a phone machine. I wish if I saw somebody on the street I didn't want to talk to I could go "Excuse me, I'm not in right now. If you could just leave a message, I could walk away." I also have a cordless phone, but I don't like that as much, because you can't slam
down a cordless phone. You get mad at somebody on a real phone - "You can't talk to me like that!" Bang! You know. You get mad at somebody on a cordless phone - "You can't talk to me like that!" (Mimes fiddly button-pressing) "I told him!"
我爱我的答录机。我希望我自己是台电话答录机。我希望在街上碰到某个不想说话的人我可以这么说:不好意思,我现在不在,麻烦你留下口信,我要闪了。我有台无绳电话,不过我不怎么喜欢,你不能摔无绳电话。你对电话那头的人发火,你可以“你怎么能这么跟我说话!”——砰!要是无绳电话就没有这种效果了,“你不能这么跟我说话!”(模仿轻巧的按下按钮)“我告诫过他的”。
May 06

Seinfeld S2 EP03

1991年2月6日
第二季第三集
夹克衫
Plot summary for "Seinfeld" The Jacket
Jerry wears an expensive jacket when he meets Elaine's father, but an argument ensues when Jerry is reluctant to wear it outside during a snowfall.
情节概要:
杰瑞见依莲的老爸时穿了一件很贵的夹克衫,不过当杰瑞拒绝穿这个去漫天风雪的户外时争端产生了。
[Setting: Night club]
(场景:俱乐部)
JERRY: I hate clothes, okay? I hate buying them. I hate picking them out of my closet. I can't stand every day trying to come up with little outfits for myself. I think eventually fashion won't even exist. It won't. I think eventually we'll all be wearing the same thing. 'Cause anytime I see a movie or a TV show where there's people from the future of another planet, they're all wearing the same thing. Somehow they decided "This is going to be our outfit. One-piece silver jumpsuit, V-stripe, and
boots. That's it." We should come up for an outfit for earth. An earth outfit. We should vote on it. Candidates propose different outfits, no speeches. They walk out, twirl, walk off. We just sit in the audience and go, "That was nice. I could wear that."
杰瑞:我讨厌衣服,真的!我讨厌买衣服。我讨厌从衣橱里挑衣服。我很难忍受每天都要挑出一些自己要穿的服饰。我认为时尚这个东西最终必将消亡。必将!最终我们都将穿着一样的东西。因为我看到的任何影视剧,里面那些来自未来外星球的人物都穿着一样的东西。这就好像他们作出一个决定:我们的服装将会是,一体式的银色跳伞服、V型条纹、靴子,酱紫!我们也该整一件,地球服。我们应该为此搞个投票。参评者提供各样的服装,不要演讲。他们穿着走出来,转个圈,走开。我们就坐在观众席,评论着:这个不错,我想穿这个……
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Clothing store]
(场景:服饰店)
JERRY: I think I've seen enough.
杰瑞:我想我是看够了。
SALESMAN: Well, I might have something in the back.
店员:嗯,后面可能还有些衣服。
ELAINE: The back? They never find anything in the back. If they had anything good in the back, they'd put it out in the front.
依莲:后面?后面能有啥好货色。要是后面有好的,不早拿到前面来了。
JERRY: Why don't they open up an entire store for the back? Call it, "Just Back." All back. No front. You walk in the front, you're immediately in the back. (Picks up a tie display) Look, Elaine, tie car wash.
杰瑞:他们干嘛不为“后面”的衣服专门开个店面?就命名为“只是后面”。都是后面,没有前面。你从正门走入,你就直接在“后面”了。(拿起一条领带)看看,依莲,洗车时的领带。
CUSTOMER: (Sees the book Elaine is holding) Oh, I just read that. That's terrific.
顾客:(看到依莲拿着的书)哦,我刚看过,真的很棒啊。
JERRY: (Pointing to Elaine) Her father wrote that.
杰瑞:(指着依莲)她老爸写的。
CUSTOMER: Alton Benes is your father?
顾客:阿尔顿.贝尼斯是你的父亲?
ELAINE: Yeah.
依莲:是啊。
CUSTOMER: I always felt he deserved a wider audience.
顾客:我总是觉得他应该得到更多读者和关注。
ELAINE: I'm not so sure he wants one. (Customer leaves) Hey, don't forget Sunday, okay? You and George are coming, right? Hotel Westbury, eight o' clock.
依莲:我不确定他要不要读者。(顾客离开)嗨,别忘了周日,好吗?你还有乔治都来,对吧?维斯贝里酒店,8点。
JERRY: ..I guess I'm coming.. I mean..
杰瑞:我想我会去的……我是说……
ELAINE: What? What, you don't want to go now?
依莲:什么?你是说,你不想去?
JERRY: No, I'll go. I'm going.
杰瑞:不,我会去的,我去的。
ELAINE: No, Jerry, you have to. I need a buffer. You know, I haven't seen my father in a while and.. you know.
依莲:不,杰瑞,你必须得去。我需要个缓冲。你知道的,我有一阵子没见我老爸了……还有你知道的……
JERRY: I'm worried I won't be able to talk to him. He's such a great writer. Frankly, I perfer the company of nitwits.
杰瑞:我有点担心我很难跟他交流。他是如此出色的作家。坦率地说,我更希望和笨蛋待着。
ELAINE: So, that's why we're not togeter anymore.
依莲:所以,我和你就不经常待在一起了。
JERRY: (Looks at a jacket) What is this? (Holds it up) This is beautiful.. but these jackets never fit me right.
杰瑞:(看着一件夹克衫)这是啥?(拿起来)帅呆了……不过这种夹克衫和我总不怎么匹配。
ELAINE: Try it on. (Feels it) Wow, this is soft suede.
依莲:试试呗。(摸了一下)喔,好柔软的山羊皮。
JERRY: This may be the most perfect jacket I have ever put on. (Elaine grabs the tag) How much is it?
杰瑞:这估计是我穿过的最完美的夹克衫了。(依莲看标签)多少钱?
ELAINE: (Shocked) Oh my God.
依莲:(震惊状)额滴神。
JERRY: Bad? (Elaine nods) ..Very bad?
杰瑞:夸张?(依莲点头)……很夸张?
ELAINE: You have no idea.
依莲:无法想像。
JERRY: I have some idea.
杰瑞:让我想象一下呗。
ELAINE: No idea.
依莲:太离谱。
JERRY: I've got a ballpark.
杰瑞:我有个大概的预估(多义词:也可意为运动场)
ELAINE: There is no park and the team has relocated.
依莲:根本没什么鱼给你沽的。
JERRY: (Looks at the tag) ..That is high.
杰瑞:(看看标签)……的确够可以的。
ELAINE: Oh man, that is a beautiful jacket, though.
依莲:老天啊,不过这的确是件漂亮的夹克衫。
JERRY: (Looking at the insides of the jacket) What's with the pink lining and the candy stripes?
杰瑞:(看看衣服内里)这粉色的衬里还有条纹图案是怎么回事?
ELAINE: Well, it's just a lining. You can always have it changed.
依莲:嗯,只是衬里罢了,你可以更换呀。
JERRY: Should I get it? I hate these moments. I'm hearing the dual voices now, you know. "What about the money?" "What's money?"
杰瑞:我应该买吗?我讨厌这种时候,我能听到二重唱——你知道吗,“那这么贵怎么办”和“钱算什么”。
SALESMAN: It looks wonderful on you.
店员:你穿着很好看。
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Jerry's apartment]
(场景:杰瑞家)
(Jerry's sitting on his couch wearing his pajamas and his new jacket. He gets up to look at his jacket in the mirror. Kramer enters)
(杰瑞穿着睡衣加新的夹克衫坐在沙发上,站起到镜子前看,克雷默进)
JERRY: Hey.
杰瑞:嗨。
KRAMER: Hey. New jacket?
克雷默:嗨,新夹克?
JERRY: What do you think?
杰瑞:你看怎么样?
KRAMER: It's beautiful.
克雷默:很漂亮啊。
JERRY: Is it me?
杰瑞:(穿着)像我吗?
KRAMER: That's definitely you.
克雷默:可不是你嘛!
JERRY: Really?
杰瑞:真的?
KRAMER: That's more you than you've ever been. (Starts looking the jacket over) What is with the pink lining?
克雷默:这比以前的你更有“真我的风采”。(仔细打量夹克)粉色衬里是怎么回事?
JERRY: I don't know. It's got a pink lining.
杰瑞:我不知道,这衣服有粉色衬里。
KRAMER: Oh.. So, what did you pay for this?
克雷默:哦……那么,你为这衣服付了多少钱?
JERRY: I paid what it costs.
杰瑞:该付多少付多少呗。
KRAMER: How much?
克雷默:多少钱?
JERRY: What's the difference?
杰瑞:干嘛问这个?
KRAMER: What, you're not gonna tell me?
克雷默:怎么,难道你不打算告诉我?
JERRY: I'd rather not say it out loud. It's embarrassing.
杰瑞:我觉得最好不要声张。有点尴尬。
KRAMER: Over three hundred?
克雷默:超过300美金?
JERRY: Yes, but let's just stop it right there.
杰瑞:是啊,不过最好别再猜了。
KRAMER: It's over four hundred?
克雷默:400以上?
JERRY: Really, I'm not answering anymore.
杰瑞:真的,我不回答了……
KRAMER: Is it over four hundred?
克雷默:是不是超过400?
JERRY: Would you?
杰瑞:麻烦你……
KRAMER: (Finds the tag) Woah, Nelson!
克雷默:(找到标签)喔!天……
JERRY: I know, I know.
杰瑞:我了,我了。
KRAMER: (Talking about his old jacket) What are you gonna do with the leather one?
克雷默:(说起一件旧的夹克)你打算怎么处置你那件皮夹克?
JERRY: I don't know.
杰瑞:不知道。
KRAMER: Well, are you gonna wear it?
克雷默:那你还会不会穿呢?
JERRY: Maybe.
杰瑞:可能吧。
KRAMER: (Looking over the leather jacket) You're not going to wear this.
克雷默:(看看皮夹克)你是不会再穿这件老的了。
JERRY: Do you want it?
杰瑞:你想要?
KRAMER: Well, yeah. Okay. I'll take it.. I like the jacket.
克雷默:嗯,是啊,好吧。我拿走了……我喜欢这夹克。
JERRY: (Takes one last look at the leather jacket) ..Okay, take it.
克雷默:(看旧夹克最后一眼)……好吧,拿走。
KRAMER: Good karma for you. (Kramer puts on his new jacket, and stands next to Jerry, looking in the mirror.) Oh baby.
克雷默:爽歪歪。(克雷默穿上夹克,站在杰瑞旁,看着镜子)宝贝儿……
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Jerry's apartment]
(场景:杰瑞家)
(George enters singing "Master Of the House" - a Les Miserables show tune)
(乔治唱着“一家之主”-悲惨世界唱段-进屋)
GEORGE: "Master of the house.. doling out the charm, ready with a handshake and an open palm. Tells a saucy talke, loves to make a stir everyone appreciates a.."
乔治:“一家之主,魅力十足;握手言欢,人人惊羡……”
JERRY: What is that song?
杰瑞:这是啥歌?
GEORGE: Oh, it's from Les Miserables. I went to see it last wee. I can't get it out of my head. I just keep singing it over and over. It just comes out. I have no control over it. I'm singing it on elevators, buses. I sing it infront of clients. It's taking over my life.
乔治:哦,这是悲惨世界里头的,我上周去看了。让人难以忘怀啊。我忍不住一遍一遍的吟唱。脱口而出,根本控制不了。我在电梯里、公交车上唱,我对着我的客户唱,这曲子统治了我的生活。
JERRY: You know, Schumann went mad from that.
杰瑞:你知道不,舒曼就是这么疯的。
GEORGE: Artie Schumann? From Camp Hatchapee?
乔治:亚蒂.舒曼?哈奇皮营地的?
JERRY: No, you idiot.
杰瑞:不是,你个小白。
GEORGE: What are you, Bud Abbott? What, are you calling my an idiot?
乔治:你是什么?二傻。你敢骂我是白痴?
JERRY: You don't know Rober Schumann? The composer?
杰瑞:你不知道罗伯特.舒曼?作曲家?
GEORGE: Oh, Schumann. Of course.
乔治:哦,舒曼,当然。
JERRY: (Trying to scare George) He went crazy from one note. He couldn't get it out of his head. I think it was an A. He kept repeating it over and over again. He had to be institutionalized.
杰瑞:(想吓吓乔治)他因为一个音符就疯了。他无法把这个音符赶出自己的脑海。我想可能是A。他不停的重复这个音符啊。不得不变得模式化了。
GEORGE: Really? ..Well, what if it doesn't stop? (Jerry gestures "That's the breaks." George gasps) Oh, that I really needed to hear. That helps a lot! Alright, just say something. Just start talking. Change the subject.. Let's just go, alright? I can't believe we're having dinner with Alton Benes.
乔治:真的?那么,要是不停止怎么办?(杰瑞表示“会有中断的”,乔治喘气)哦,那我得听听。会很有帮助的。好吧,说点什么吧。随便说点什么,换个话题……我们走吧,行不?不敢相信我们要和阿尔顿.贝尼斯共进晚餐。
JERRY: I know exactly what's goin to happen tonight. I'm gonna try and act like I'm not impressed, he's gonna see right through it.
杰瑞:我很清楚今晚会发生些什么。我会表现得毫不在意的样子,他应该会明了吧。
GEORGE: Yeah, he'll be looking at us like he's backstage at a puppet show.
乔治:是啊,他看着我们就好像在操纵一场木偶戏一样简单。
JERRY: Let me just get my jacket. (Moves to the bedroom)
杰瑞:我去拿我的夹克。(去卧室)
GEORGE: "Master of the house, keeper of the inn.." (Jerry proudly models his new jacket infront of George. George looks in admiration at the jacket) This is huge! When did this happen?
乔治:“一家之主,小屋守卫……”(杰瑞自豪的在乔治面前显摆自己的新夹克,乔治很羡慕的看着)酷的嘛!啥时候买的?
JERRY: Wednesday. This jacket has completely changed my life. When I leave the house in this, it's with a whole different confidence. Like tonight, I might've been a little nervous. But, inside this jacket, I am composed, grounded, secure that I can meet an social challenge.
杰瑞:周三。这件夹克彻底改变了我的生活。当我穿着它走出这间屋子时,给我一种全然不同的自信心。就像今晚,我也许还有点紧张,不过在这件夹克里,我很沉静、很有底气还有安全感,我能面对一切挑战。
GEORGE: (Nods) Can I say one thing to you? And I say this wiht an unblemished record of staunch heterosexuality.
乔治:(点头)能和你说件事不?说这个时候我毫不带丝毫反异性恋的立场。
JERRY: Absolutely.
杰瑞:好啊。
GEORGE: ..It's fabulous.
乔治:这……太棒了!
JERRY: I know.
杰瑞:我了。
GEORGE: And I'll tell you something else, I'm not even going to ask you. I want to know. But I'm not going to ask. You'll tell me when you feel comfortable.. So what was it? Four hundred? Five hundred? Did you pay five hundred for this? (Jerry's acting coy throughout the whole thing) Over six? Can't be seven. Don't tell my you paid seven hundred dollars for this jacket! Did you pay seven hundred dollars for this jacket? Is that what you're saying to me?! You are sick! Is that what you paid for this jacket?! Over seven hundred? What did you pay for this jacket? I won't say anything. I wanna know what you paid for this jacket! Oh my God! A thousand dollars?! You paid a thousand dollars for this jacket?! Alright, fine. I'm walking out of here right now thinking you paid a thousand dollars for this jacket, unless you tell me different. (Jerry still coy, stays silent) Oh, ho! Alright! I'll tell you what, if you don't say anything in the next five seconds, I'll know it was over a thousand..
乔治:我还想告诉你一点别的,我甚至都不打算问你。我想知道,但我不问。你觉得可以就告诉我吧……到底多少钱?400?500?你花500大洋买的这个?(杰瑞腼腆的不理会)600多?不可能700吧?!别告诉我你为了件夹克花了700!到底是不是花了700买的这夹克!?你想表达啥意思?你这变态的家伙!你为这花了多少钱?超过700?!你真的花了这么多?超过700?你到底花多少钱?我懒得理你了。我想知道你到底花多少钱!额滴神!1000?你为这夹克花了1000?好吧,好的……我马上离开这里,心里想着你为这夹克花了1000,除非你告诉我不是这个数。(杰瑞还不说话)哦,靠!好吧,我跟你说哦,5秒钟内你还不说,我就认为这超过1000了……
(Enter Kramer)
(克雷默进)
KRAMER: Hey. Hey, would you do me a solid?
克雷默:嗨,嗨,帮个大忙行不?
JERRY: Well, what kind of solid?
杰瑞:好吧,啥事儿?
KRAMER: I need you to sit in the car for two minutes while it's double-parked. I gotta pick up some birds.
克雷默:我想你坐在我车里2分钟,以防被贴“警告”,我得去找些鸟。
JERRY: Birds?
杰瑞:鸟?
KRAMER: Yeah. A friend of mine, he's a magician. He's going away on vacation. He asked me to take care of his doves.
克雷默:是啊,一个朋友,他是个魔术师。他要去度假。他要我照顾他的鸽子们。
JERRY: So take a cab.
杰瑞:那你打车去好啦。
KRAMER: They won't take a cage full of birds.
克雷默:出租车不让带鸟笼的。
JERRY: I can't. I'm on my way out. There's no way I can do it.
杰瑞:我不能。我要出门呢。帮不了你。
KRAMER: George, do me a solid? Two minutes.
克雷默:乔治,帮个忙呗!就2分钟。
GEORGE: Well, I'm going with him. I'd like to, I've never done a solid before.
乔治:好吧,我跟你走。我想去,貌似我从未帮过你大忙。
KRAMER: Alright.. yeah.. alright, have a good one.
克雷默:好吧,嗯,好,这可是大事。
(Kramer leaves)
(克雷默走)
JERRY: (Scoffs) Two minutes. Believe me, I know his two minutes.. By his conception of time, his life will last over two thousand years.
杰瑞:(嘲笑)2分钟,相信我吧,我可领教过他的“2分钟”……按他的时间观念,他的生命可以长达2000年。
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Hotel lobby]
(场景:酒店大堂)
(Jerry and George enter. George's singing "Master of the House")
(杰瑞、乔治进,乔治哼唱“一家之主”)
GEORGE: "Master of the House. Quick to catch your eye, never wants a passerby to pass him by."
乔治:“一家之主,引人瞩目,走过路过,不会错过”
JERRY: (Points to his head) Schumann. (George gets visibly scared) Where are they?
杰瑞:(指着他的头)舒曼。(乔治惊恐)他们在哪儿?
GEORGE: Maybe he didn't show up.
乔治:可能他没来。
JERRY: What, you don't want to do this?
杰瑞:什么,你不想过来?
GEORGE: I don't think there's ever been an appointment in my life where I wanted the other guy to show up.
乔治:我想,在我的生命里,什么约会我都不指望对方出现。
GEORGE: (Sees an elderly man sitting on a leather chair) Wait a second, is that him?
乔治:(看见一个长者坐在皮椅上)等等,那是不是他?
JERRY: Yeah, I think it is. (They walk tward him) Where's Elaine?
杰瑞:是,我想是的。(他们走近)依莲在哪儿?
GEORGE: I'm nervous.
乔治:我很紧张。
JERRY: Excuse me.. Mister Benes?
杰瑞:请问……您是贝尼斯先生吗?
ALTON: Yeah?
阿尔顿:是啊。你是?
JERRY: I'm Jerry. Elaine's friend.. and this is George.
杰瑞:我是杰瑞。依莲的朋友……这位是乔治。
GEORGE: (Holds out his hand for a handshake) It's a great thrill to meet you, Sir.
乔治:(伸手,欲握手)见到您非常高兴,先生。
(Alton starts hacking, George withdraws his hand)
(阿尔顿咳嗽,乔治收手)
ALTON: Sit down. Want a drink?
阿尔顿:坐吧,要喝点啥?
JERRY: Sure.
杰瑞:行。
ALTON: (Summons waiter) What do you have?
阿尔顿:(招服务生)有些啥喝的?
JERRY: (To waiter) I'll have a cranberry juice with two limes.
杰瑞:(对服务生)我要草莓汁加酸橙。
GEORGE: And, I'll have a club soda with no ice.
乔治:我要苏打水,不加冰。
BENES: (Gives both Jerry and George a look) I'll have another Scotch with plenty of ice.
贝尼斯:(看了两人一眼)我要苏格兰威士忌,加很多冰。
GEORGE: You like ice?
乔治:你喜欢冰?
ALTON: Huh?
阿尔顿:怎么?
GEORGE: I said, do you like ice?
乔治:我说,你喜欢冰?
ALTON: Like it?
阿尔顿:喜欢?
GEORGE: Don't you think you get more without it?
乔治:你不认为不加冰的更有味道?
ALTON: (Pauses) Where's Elaine?
阿尔顿:(停顿)依莲在哪儿?
JERRY: Well, we thought she was meeting you earlier. She's usually pretty punctual. (Alton remains quiet) ..Don't you find that, George?
杰瑞:嗯,我们以为她会早点出现呢,她一直很守时的。(阿尔顿保持沉默)你有没有发现,乔治?
GEORGE: Yeah, yeah. She's punctual.. and she's been late sometimes.
乔治:是,是,她很守时……她有时也迟到。
JERRY: Yeah, yeah. Sometimes she's on time, and sometimes she's late.
杰瑞:是,是,有时她准时,有时她迟到。
GEORGE: I guess today she's late.
乔治:我想今天她是迟到了。
JERRY: It appears that way.
杰瑞:看起来是的。
GEORGE: Yep.
乔治:是。
JERRY: Yep.
杰瑞:是啊。
(Both Jerry and George look at the door, anticipating Elaine's arrival)
(杰瑞、乔治都看着门,期待依莲到来)
ALTON: Looks like rain.
阿尔顿:看起来要下雨。
GEORGE: (Perks up) I know, I know, that's what they said.
乔治:(活跃状)我就知道,这就是他们所谓的……
ALTON: Who said?
阿尔顿:谁所谓的?
GEORGE: The weather guy, Dr. Waldo.
乔治:天气预报的家伙啊,瓦尔多博士。
ALTON: I don't need anybody to tell me it's gonna rain.
阿尔顿:我可不需要任何人来告诉我会下雨。
GEORGE: No, of course not. I didn't..
乔治:不,当然不用,我不是……
ALTON: All I have to do is stick my head out the window. (Waiter shows up with the drinks) Which one's suppose to be the funny guy?
阿尔顿:我所要做的就是把我的头伸出窗去。(服务生拿饮料过来)哪个家伙是搞笑的那位?
GEORGE: (Pointing at Jerry) Oh, he's the comedian.
乔治:(指着杰瑞)哦,他是个喜剧大师。
JERRY: I'm just a regular person.
杰瑞:我只是个普通人。
GEORGE: No, no. He's just being modest.
乔治:不,不,他只是谦虚。
ALTON: We had a funny guy with us in Korea. A tailgunner. They blew his brains out all over the Pacific. (Long pause) There's nothing funny about that.
阿尔顿:在朝鲜我们有个搞笑的家伙。追踪炮。他们把他打得稀烂。(长停顿)这事儿没啥好笑的。
(Jerry and George turn to the door again)
(杰瑞和乔治再度望着门口)
JERRY: Would you excuse me a minute? I'm gonna go to the bathroom. I'll be right back.
杰瑞:不好意思,我得去一下洗手间。马上回来。
(Jerry leaves. George is left alone with Alton)
(杰瑞离开,乔治与阿尔顿独处)
GEORGE: I just wanted to tell you that I really enjoyed Fair Game. I thought it was just brilliant.
乔治:我只想告诉您,我很喜欢《公平游戏》这本书。太精彩了。
ALTON: Drivel.
阿尔顿:扯淡。
GEORGE: Maybe some parts.
乔治:可能某些部分(精彩)。
ALTON: What parts?
阿尔顿:什么部分?
GEORGE: The drivel parts.. Oh my gosh, I just realized - I have to make a phone call. I can believe.. would you.. (Gets up, and leaves)
乔治:扯淡的部分……哦天啊,我刚意识到,我得去打个电话,真是……不好意思……(起身,离开)
(Scene cuts to the hotel bathroom)
(酒店洗手间)
GEORGE: Thank you for leaving me alone with him!
乔治:谢谢你把我一个人留下来陪他!
JERRY: That was brutal. I can't go back out there.
杰瑞:太吓人了,我不能回去那里。
GEORGE: Well, let's just leave.
乔治:那么我们走吧。
JERRY: Elaine'll kill me.
杰瑞:依莲会杀了我的。
GEORGE: Where is she?
乔治:她在哪儿?
JERRY: She's gotta be here soon.
杰瑞:应该很快就到了吧。
GEORGE: How could she leave us alone with this lunatic? Ten more minutes, and that's it! I'm leaving. I have to tell you, this guy scares me.
乔治:她怎么能让我们和那个疯子独处?再过10分钟,我必须走!受不了啦,我不得不告诉你,我给那家伙吓坏了。
JERRY: The waiter was trembling.
杰瑞:服务生都发抖了。
GEORGE: If she doesn't show up, we can't possibly have dinner with him alone.
乔治:她再不出现的话,我们不可能和他共进晚餐的。
JERRY: How are we gonna get out of it?
杰瑞:我们怎么摆脱这个啊?
GEORGE: We'll say we're frightened and we have to go home.
乔治:我们就说我们很惊恐,必须得回家。
JERRY: Yeah, that's good. He'd clunk our heads together like Moe.
杰瑞:是,很好。他会像摩尔一样砍了我们的头。
GEORGE: I don't know. Just start scratching. Tell him you have the crabs. He was in the military. He'll understand that.
乔治:我不知道。要不开始挠痒痒。告诉他你有阴虱,他在军队里待过,他会懂的。
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Night club]
(场景:俱乐部)
JERRY: All fathers are intimidating. They're intimidating because they are fathers. Once a man has children, for the rest of his life, his attitude is, "To hell with the world, I can make my own people. I'll eat whatever I want. I'll wear whatever I want, and I'll create whoever I want."
杰瑞:所有的父辈都很吓人的。他们很吓人只是因为他们是父辈。当一个人有了孩子,在他的余生,他的态度都会是,“这该死的世界,我可以造人,我能吃任何想吃的,穿我想穿的,造任何我想造的人”
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Hotel lobby]
(场景:酒店大堂)
(Jerry and George come back from the bathroom)
(杰瑞和乔治从洗手间返回)
ALTON: Who'd you call?
阿尔顿:你给谁电话?
GEORGE: (Caught off guard) My uncle is having an operation. I just wanted to see how he was.
乔治:(警觉)我叔叔在动手术呢,我想了解一下情况如何了。
ALTON: What kind of operation?
阿尔顿:什么手术啊?
GEORGE: Bone marrow.
乔治:骨髓。
(Manager approaches)
(经理过来)
MANAGER: Mister Benes?
经理:贝尼斯先生?
ALTON: Yes?
阿尔顿:怎么?
MANAGER: A message for you. (Hands him a message)
经理:有个您的口信。(给他纸片)
ALTON: From Elaine. She got tied up. She'll be here in thirty minutes. (Jerry and George freeze)
阿尔顿:依莲的。她太忙了。30分钟内会到。(杰瑞和乔治哇凉哇凉的)
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Hotel lobby]
(场景:酒店大堂)
ALTON: Yeah, they should've taken care of Castro when they had the chance. Like we did in Guatamala in 'fifty-three.
阿尔顿:是啊,他们应该抓住机会,处理掉卡斯特罗,就像我们1953年在瓜地马拉做的那样。
JERRY: (Adding) Well, Guatamala.
杰瑞:(附和)是啊,瓜地马拉。
GEORGE: Sure, Guatamala.
乔治:可不是嘛,瓜地马拉。
ALTON: (Gets up) Alright, you boys get yourselves together. We'll head up to the restaurant. I'll leave a note for Elaine. I'm going to the bathroom. (Leaves)
阿尔顿:(起身)好吧,你们振作一点哈。我们去餐厅。我给依莲留个口信。我去一下洗手间。(离开)
GEORGE: Come on, let's go!
乔治:得了吧!我们闪!
JERRY: What about Elaine?
杰瑞:依莲怎么办?
GEORGE: To hell with Elaine!
乔治:让她见鬼去吧!
JERRY: She'll be furious.
杰瑞:她会抓狂的。
GEORGE: We're dying here!
乔治:我们都快死了啊!
(Elaine enters)
(依莲进)
JERRY: That's her! She's here!
杰瑞:瞧,她来了!
ELAINE: I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Where is Dad?
依莲:抱歉啊,实在抱歉。我老爸在哪儿?
GEORGE: (Mocking Alton's voice) He's in the bathroom.
乔治:(模仿阿尔顿的声音)他在洗手间。
JERRY: Where have you been?!
杰瑞:你刚才在干什么?
ELAINE: Kramer, that .. Kramer! I'm just about to leave, he calls me up. He begs me to sit in his car for two minutes, so he can pick up these birds..
依莲:克雷默,那个该死的……克雷默!我刚要离开时,他叫我。他求我在他的车里坐两分钟,他可以去“接”他的鸟儿。
JERRY: Oh, you didn't..
杰瑞:哦,你不是吧……
ELAINE: Well, he said he'd drive me here right after. So, I am sitting in his car twenty minutes! he doesn't come down. I am freezing. Then a cop comes by, tells me to get out of the car. He's a city marshal. He's towing the car away. Kramer owes thousands of dollars in back tickets. He was going to tow it with me in the car! So, they tow the car. Now, I am standing outside, and I am freezing, but I cannot leave because I have to tell him what happened to the car.. so, finally, he finally comes down with his giant cage filled with doves. He said he was getting special instructions, that each dove has a different diet. So, we're wandering around trying to get a cab, when two of these doves fly out! Now we're running down the street after these doves. I almost got hit by a bus. (Sits down, takes a deep breath) ..So how's everything going over here?
依莲:是的,他还说完事后会开车送我过来。所以,我就在他的车里坐了20分钟!他还不回来,我冻死了。接着来了个警察,要我离开车子。他是个城市巡警。他要把车子拖走。克雷默的后座上堆了几千块的罚单。那警察准备连我一起拖走了!所以,他们把车拖走了。我就在外面了,冻得要死,但我还不能离开因为我必须告诉他他的车子出什么事了。所以,最后,他带着他装满鸽子的巨型鸟笼过来了。他说他有特别的指令,每个鸽子都有不同的饮食。我们绕着城市转圈想打车,2个鸽子飞走了!我们就沿街追赶鸽子,我差点被汽车撞上。(坐下,深呼吸)……话说回来,你们这里啥状况?
JERRY: (After hearing Elaine's story, his is..) Great.
杰瑞:(听完依莲的故事……)很好!
GEORGE: Couldn't be better.
乔治:不能再好了。
ELAINE: Good. 'Cause Dad can make some people a little uncomfortable.
依莲:好,我老爸可不是盏省油的灯,经常让人不爽。
JERRY: Oh, no, no.
杰瑞:哦,没有,没有。
GEORGE: Get outta here..
乔治:哪有啊……
ELAINE: Man, Kramer! I could kill him.
依莲:天,克雷默!我要杀了他。
JERRY: I can't believe it. You know better than to get involved with Kramer.
杰瑞:难以置信。你最好不要跟克雷默搞在一起。
ELAINE: He said he'd give me a lift.
依莲:他说他要送我过来的。
JERRY: Ah, the lift. Like the lure of the siren's song. Never what it seems to be, yet who among us can resist?
杰瑞:啊,送你。就像海妖歌声的诱惑。从来不是看起来那样美好,可我们之中又有谁能抗拒这魔力?
GEORGE: Where do you come up with this stuff?
乔治:你还真TM一套一套的。
ALTON: (Returns) Well, look who's here.
阿尔顿:(回来)哦?看看谁来了。
ELAINE: Oh, Hi, Dad.
依莲:哦,嗨,老爸。
ALTON: (Kisses Elaine) Hello, dear. Who's the lipstick for?
阿尔顿:(吻依莲)你好,亲爱的。你为谁涂的唇膏?
ELAINE: No one.
依莲:没有谁。
ALTON: ..How's your mother?
阿尔顿:你老妈怎么样?
ELAINE: Fine.
依莲:不错。
ALTON: How about you? Are you working?
阿尔顿:你怎么样?你还上班吗?
ELAINE: Yeah, I'm reading manuscripts for Pendant Publishing. I told you ten times.
依莲:是啊,我在攀登出版社读校手稿。我跟你说了10遍了。
ALTON: Pendant, those bastards.. Alright, boys. We'll go to that Pakistani restaurant on 46th Street. You're not afraid of a little spice, are you?
阿尔顿:攀登,那些混球。好吧,伙计们,我们去46街的巴基斯坦餐厅。你们不怕一点小辣吧?
(They all head for the door. Jerry and George trail behind a little)
(往门口去,杰瑞和乔治靠后)
GEORGE: "Master of the house, doling out the charm. Ready with a handshake and an open.."
乔治:“一家之主,魅力十足;握手言欢,人人惊羡”
ALTON: Pipe down, chorus boy.
阿尔顿:省省吧,合唱团男生。
(Alton glares, George gets embarrassed)
(阿尔顿瞪他,乔治尴尬)
ELAINE: Ohh.. it's snowing. It's beautiful.
依莲:哦……下雪了,好美啊!
JERRY: (To George) Snow.. snow, that can't be good for suede, can it?
杰瑞:(对乔治)雪啊……雪,小山羊皮应该不适合这天气吧?
GEORGE: I wouldn't think so.
乔治:恐怕是的。
JERRY: What should I do? (To Alton) We're taking a cab, aren't we?
杰瑞:我该怎么办?(对阿尔顿)我们打车,对吧?
ALTON: Cab? It's only five blocks.
阿尔顿:打车?只有5个街区而已。
GEORGE: (To Jerry) Why don't you just turn it inside out?
乔治:(对杰瑞)你可以把底子翻出来穿。
JERRY: Inside out! Great.
杰瑞:翻过来穿,有道理!
(Jery turns his jacket inside out, showing of the pink striped insides. Alton stops him before Jerry can leave the hotel)
(杰瑞翻过他的夹克,展示衣服的粉色条纹衬里,阿尔顿没让杰瑞出门)
ALTON: Wait a minute. What the hell do you call this?
阿尔顿:等等,你这穿的是个什么鬼东西?
JERRY: Oh, I turned my jacket inside out.
杰瑞:哦,我把我的夹克翻过来穿了。
ALTON: Well, you look like a damn fool!
阿尔顿:好吧,你看起来像个十足的傻子!
JERRY: (Like a child) Well, it's a new suede jacket. It might get ruined.
杰瑞:(像个孩子)嗯,这可是我全新的山羊皮夹克,会被风雪给毁了的。
ALTON: Well, you're not going to walk down the street with my and my daughter dressed like that! That's for damn sure!
阿尔顿:好吧,穿成这个德行,我还有依莲是不会和你同路走的!
(Jerry looks at George)
(杰瑞看着乔治)
GEORGE: It's only a few blocks.
乔治:只是几个路口而已。
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Jerry's apartment]
(场景:杰瑞家)
(Jerry's heading out, the intercom buzzes)
(门铃响)
JERRY: (Into intercom) Elaine?
杰瑞:依莲?
ELAINE: Yeah.
依莲:是。
JERRY: Come on up.
杰瑞:上来吧。
(Enter Kramer)
(克雷默进)
KRAMER: Hey.
克雷默:嗨。
JERRY: Hey.
杰瑞:嗨。
KRAMER: I've gotta feed the birds.
克雷默:我得喂鸟。
JERRY: So?..
杰瑞:怎样?
KRAMER: You got any of those mini Ritzes?
克雷默:你有小零食不?
(Jerry reaches up, and pulls out some mini Ritzes)
(杰瑞找出一包零食)
JERRY: I can't believe I do.
杰瑞:不敢相信……
KRAMER: Yeah! ..Well, are you going out?
克雷默:哦!嗯,你们要出去?
JERRY: Yeah.
杰瑞:是的。
KRAMER: Hey, where's your new jacket? (Jerry points to the jacket hanging in the bathroom. It's ruined, and unwearable) What? (Kramer enters the bathroom, he's shocked at the sight of the jacket) Ohhh. What did you do to it?
克雷默:嗨,你的新夹克呢?(杰瑞指着洗手间里挂着的夹克,毁了,不能穿了)什么?(克雷默进洗手间,看到夹克很震惊)哦,你对它干什么了?
JERRY: I was out in the snow last night.
杰瑞:昨晚我穿着它在雪中走。
KRAMER: Don't youk now what that does to suede?
克雷默:难道你不知道这对山羊皮的危害吗?
JERRY: I have an idea. (Elaine enters) We can make the nine-thirty at Cinema III.
杰瑞:我有个主意。(依莲进)我们可以去看9点半的电影。
ELAINE: Okay.. (To Kramer) Hello. (To Jerry) Listen, thanks again for coming last night. Dad said he had a great time.
依莲:好吧。(对克雷默)嗨。(对杰瑞)听着,谢谢你昨晚过来。老爸说他很开心。
JERRY: Is he still in town?
杰瑞:他还在城里吗?
ELAINE: No, he's driving back to Maryland tonight.
依莲:不,他今晚就回马里兰了。
KRAMER: (Talking about the ruined jacket) So, uh.. what are you gonna do with that one now?
克雷默:(说起被毁了的夹克)那么,嗯,你会怎么处理这个?
JERRY: I don't know.
杰瑞:不知道啊。
KRAMER: Well?..
克雷默:嗯……
ELAINE: (To Jerry) I didn't want to tell you this, but usually he hates everyone.
依莲:(对杰瑞)我不想跟你说这个,但是他恨所有人。
JERRY: Really?
杰瑞:真的?
KRAMER: You gonna throw this out?
克雷默:你要扔了它?
JERRY: Well, I can't wear it.
杰瑞:怎么办呢,我又不能穿了。
ELAINE: (To Jerry) Yeah, he like you though. Said you reminded him of somebody he knew in Korea.
依莲:(对杰瑞)是,他嗨有点喜欢你。说你让他想起了他在朝鲜认识的某人。
KRAMER: Well, if you're just gonna throw it out, you know, I could take it.
克雷默:好吧,如果你要扔了,你要记得,我可以接受的哦。
JERRY: Yeah, go ahead, take it.
杰瑞:好啊,你拿走吧。
ELAINE: Dad thinks George is gay.
依莲:老爸认为乔治是个同志。
JERRY: Oh, because of all that singing?
杰瑞:哦,因为唱歌的事情吗?
ELAINE: No, he pretty much thinks everyone is gay.
依莲:不,他大概认为全部的人都是同性恋。
(Kramer returns from the bathroom wearing the ruined suede jacket)
(克雷默穿着毁了的山羊皮夹克)
KRAMER: Hey, see, I like it like this.
克雷默:嗨,看,我喜欢这衣服。
ELAINE: (Pointing at the jacket Kramer's wearing) Isnt' that..? (Jerry nods) Oh, is this fromt he snow last night? (Jerry nods again) Ugh.. you know what you should've done? You should've turned it inside out.
依莲:(指着克雷默穿的夹克)这不是……?(杰瑞点头)哦,昨晚的风雪干的好事吧?(杰瑞再度点头)哦……你知道应该怎么处理吗?你应该翻过来穿。
JERRY: I'll try and remember that.
杰瑞:我会试着记住你的话的。
KRAMER: (Talking about the leather jacket from the start of the show) Boy, it's too bad you gave me this one too.
克雷默:(说起之前的皮夹克)爽歪歪,你把两件都给我了。
JERRY: (Sarcastic) Yeah, too bad.
杰瑞:(讽刺)可不是嘛,太可怜了我。
KRAMER: I'm gonna have to do something about this lining.
克雷默:我得处理一下衬里。
(Kramer exits, Scene ends)
(克雷默走)
[Setting: Alton Benes' car]
(场景:阿尔顿车内)
(Alton is driving home, then all the sudden, he starts to sing)
(阿尔顿回家,突然,开始唱歌)
ALTON: "Master of the house doling out the charm, ready with a handshake and an open palm.."
阿尔顿:“一家之主,魅力十足;握手言欢,人人惊羡”
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Night club]
(场景:俱乐部)
JERRY: I had a leather jacket that got ruined. Now, why does moisture ruin leather? I don't get this. Aren't cows ouside most of the time? I don't understand it. When it's raining do cows go up to the farmhouse, "Let us in, we're all wearing leather.. Open the door! We're gonna ruin the whole outfit here.." "Is it suede?" "I am suede, the whole thing is suede, I can't have this cleaned. It's all I got!"
杰瑞:我有件被毁了的皮夹克,为什么潮湿会毁了皮衣?我不动。难道那些奶牛不待在户外吗?我不懂了。难道下雨时,奶牛们都要涌到农舍里,”让我们进来,我们都穿着皮草呢……打开门!我们会把外套给毁了的!“这是山羊皮的吗?我都不能拿去清洗。这可是我仅有的啊……
 
END OF SHOW.
April 16

Seinfeld S2 EP02

1991年1月30日
第二季第二集
小马驹儿
Plot summary for "Seinfeld" The Pony Remark
Jerry fears that an inappropriate comment he made at a dinner party caused his relative's subsequent death.
情节概要:
杰瑞害怕由于他在一次晚宴上的不恰当言论导致了一个亲戚的亡故。
[Setting: Night club]
(场景:俱乐部)
JERRY: My parents live in Florida now. They moved there last year. They didn't want to move to Floriday, but they're in their sixties, and that's the law. You know how it works. They got the leisure police. They pull up in front of the old people's house with a golf cart, jump out, "Let's go Pop, white belt, white pants, white shoes, get in the back. Drop the snow shovel right there, drop it!" I am not much for the family gathering. You know, you sit there, and the conversation's so boring. It's so dull. And you start to fantasize. You know, you think, what if I just got up and jumped out that window? What would it be like? Just crashed right through the glass.. You know. Come back in, there's broken glass, everybody's all upset. "No, I'm alright. I was just a little bored, there. No, I'm fine. I came back. I wanted to hear a little about that Hummel collection, Aunt Rose. Let's pick it up right there."
杰瑞:我父母现在住在佛罗里达。他们去年搬过去的。他们并不想搬过去,但是他们都60了,这就好像自然法则一样。你知道这是咋回事。他们有的警察都充满闲情逸致。他们会开着高尔夫球场的小车停在老人们的屋前,跳出来说“我们走吧,去打球,穿戴整齐了,上车。丢下雪铲,丢下它。”我不是个很喜欢家庭聚会的人,傻傻的坐在那里,都是些无聊的对话,太无趣了。你只能开始做白日梦。比如,如果我刚起来从窗口跳出去会怎样?撞得慢地碎玻璃……醒醒,回过神来,大家都很不安。“不,没事,我只是有点无论了,没事,我不要紧的。我想了解一点Hummel产品,罗斯婶婶怎么样了?我们把那些捡起来吧。”
[Setting: Jerry's apartment]
(场景:杰瑞家)
(Jerry's parents are in town. His father's watching T.V., his mother is ironing his father's jackets)
(杰瑞父母来了,爸爸在看电视,妈妈在熨衣服)
HELEN: (To Morty) You have so many nice jackets. I don't know why you had to bring this jacket. Who wears a jacket like this? (He doesn't respond) What's wrong with that nice gray one? You have beautiful clothes. They sit in your closet. Morty, you can't wear - this!
海伦:(对莫蒂)你有那么多漂亮的外套,就弄不明白你为啥带这件过来。居然有人会穿这种衣服!(他不理会)那件灰色的怎么啦?你有漂亮的衣服。它们就待在你的衣柜里,莫蒂,行行好别穿这件啦!
(Phone rings)
(电话铃响)
MORTY: Are you getting that?
莫蒂:你要接吗?
HELEN: I thought you were getting it.
海伦:我以为你要接呢。
MORTY: Should I pick up?
莫蒂:我应该接吗?
HELEN: You want me to get that?
海伦:你想要我接?
MORTY: I'll get it!
莫蒂:好吧,我去接!~
HELEN: I'll get it!
海伦:我来接!
(They both go for the phone, Helen gets to it first)
(他们一起去接电话,海伦先抢到)
HELEN: Hello?.. Hello?
海伦:喂……喂?
(She hangs up. Jerry enters - he's wearing baseball clothes and carrying a bat and glove)
(她挂断,杰瑞进——他穿着棒球衫,带着球棒和手套)
JERRY: (Talking about the loud T.V.) Would you make this thing lower! I can hear it on the street! (Turns it off)
杰瑞:(说到电视声响太大)麻烦您小声点行不!我在大街上都能听到!(关了)
MORTY: So, how'd you do?
莫蒂:你们比得如何?
JERRY: We won. I made an incredible play in the field! There was a tag-up at third base and I threw the guy out from left field on a fly! We'll be in the championship game Wednesday because of me. It was the single greatest moment of my life.
杰瑞:我们赢了。我打得极为出色。三垒那儿有个触杀,我扔了个高球把他振出局了。全靠有我,我们队挺进了周三的决赛。这真是我人生中最辉煌的时刻啊。
HELEN: This is your greatest moment? A game?
海伦:这是你的辉煌一刻?一场球?
JERRY: Well, no. Sharon Besser, of course.
杰瑞:当然不是,莎朗.贝斯儿,当然。
MORTY: You know what my greatest moment was, don't you? 1946. I went to work for Harry Flemming and I came up with the idea for the beltless trench coat.
莫蒂:你知道我的辉煌时刻是啥?1946年,我为哈利.弗莱明工作的时候,想出来束腰风衣的点子。
HELEN: Jerry, look at this sport jacket. Is this a jacket to wear to an anniversary party?
海伦:杰瑞,看看这件运动夹克,这种衣服也能穿到庆典派对上面?
JERRY: Well, the man's an individualist. He worked for Harry Flemming. He knows what he's doing.
杰瑞:好吧,这位老兄是个人主义者,他为哈利工作过,他知道他在干啥。
HELEN: But it's their 50th anniversary.
海伦:但是这可是人家的50周年纪念日。
MORTY: You know, I spoke to Manya and Isaac on the phone today. They invited you again. I think you should go.
莫蒂:你知道嘛,我今天和曼雅还有伊萨克通过电话,他们又邀请你了,我想你还是去吧。
JERRY: First of all, I made plans with Elaine.
杰瑞:首先,我和依莲有约。
HELEN: So bring her.
海伦:那就带上她呗。
JERRY: I don't even know them. What is she, your second cousin? I mean, I've met them three times in my life.
杰瑞:我都不认识他们。她是什么来头,你的表表亲?我是说,总共也就见面过三次。
MORTY: I don't know her either. (Gesturing to Helen) She makes me fly all the way from Floriday for this, and then she criticizes my jacket.
莫蒂:我也不认识她呀。(对海伦示意)她要我从佛罗里达大老远的飞过来,就为了数落我的夹克。
HELEN: At least come and say hello, have a cup of coffee, then you'll leave.
海伦:至少过去问个好嘛,喝杯咖啡啥的,你就可以闪了。
MORTY: How come he gets to leave?
莫蒂:他为什么可以走?
JERRY: If I wind up sitting nest to Uncle Leo, I am leaving. He's always grabbing my arm when he talks to me. I guess it's because so many people have left in the middle of his conversation.
杰瑞:要是我还是被安排坐在里奥叔旁边,我就走。他说话时,总是抓紧我的胳膊。我想可能是因为人们总是想逃避和他聊天。
MORTY: And it's always about Jeffrey, right?
莫蒂:那些废话总是关于杰弗瑞对吧?
JERRY: Hey, he talks about him like he split the atom. The kid works for the Parks Department.
杰瑞:没错,他说起杰弗瑞来就好像那家伙分离了原子一样,这伙计只不过是在公园工作而已。
(Enter Kramer)
(克雷默进)
KRAMER: Morty, are you coming in?
克雷默:莫蒂,你要过来吗?
MORTY: Oh, yeah. I forgot all about it.
莫蒂:哦,当然,我差点忘了。
KRAMER: (To Jerry) Hey, how'd you do?
克雷默:(对杰瑞)嗨,你表现如何?
JERRY: We won. We're in the finals on Wednesday..
杰瑞:我们赢了,周三决赛日。
KRAMER: Yeah!
克雷默:好耶!
JERRY: (To Kramer and Morty) What is this about?
杰瑞:(对克雷默和莫蒂)你们在搞什么?
KRAMER: I'm completely changing the configuration of the apartment. You're not gonna believe it when you see it. A whole new lifestyle.
克雷默:这将彻底改变公寓的结构。当你看到时你会觉得很惊讶。全新的生活方式。
JERRY: What are you doing?
杰瑞:你要干啥?
KRAMER: Levels.
克雷默:台阶。
JERRY: Levels?
杰瑞:台阶?
KRAMER: Yeah, I'm getting rid of all my furniture. All of it. And I'm going to build these different levels, with steps, and it'll all be carpeted with a lot of pillows. You know, like ancient Egypt.
克雷默:是啊,我要处理掉我全部的家具。全部。我要造不同的台阶,全部用枕头铺上。就像古埃及一样。
JERRY: You drew up plans for this?
杰瑞:你为这个还专门设计了计划?
KRAMER: No, no. It's all in my head.
克雷默:不,不,都在我脑子里呢。
MORTY: I don't know how you're going to be comfortable like that.
莫蒂:你觉得这样很舒坦?
KRAMER: Oh, I'll be comfortable.
克雷默:哦,一定会的。
JERRY: When do you intend to do this?
杰瑞:你什么时候开工?
KRAMER: Ohh.. should be done by the end of the month.
克雷默:哦……这个月末就该完工了。
JERRY: You're doing this yourself?
杰瑞:你一个人做?
KRAMER: It's a simple job. Why, you don't think I can?
克雷默:这是个很简单的工作,难道你认为我做不成?
JERRY: Oh, no. It's not that I don't think you can. I know that you can't, and I'm positive that you won't.
杰瑞:哦,不,不是我认为你做不成。是我知道你肯定做不成,我还坚信你不会做。
KRAMER: Well, I got the tools. I got the pillows. All I need is the lumber.
克雷默:哼,我有工具,我有枕头,只需要木材了。
MORTY: Hey, that's some big job.
莫蒂:嗨,那可是大工程。
JERRY: I don't see it happening.
杰瑞:我不认为这会发生。
KRAMER: Well, this time, this time you're wrong. C'mon. I'll even bet you.
克雷默:好吧,我会证明你们错了,好吧,我要打赌。
JERRY: Seriously?
杰瑞:你当真?
HELEN: I dont' want you betting. Morty, don't let him bet.
海伦:我认为你还是别赌,莫蒂,别让他赌。
KRAMER: A big dinner with dessert. But I've got till the end of the month.
克雷默:一次丰盛的晚宴带甜点的。不过我得到月底才能品尝到了。
JERRY: I'll give you a year.
杰瑞:我可以给你一年时间。
KRAMER: No, no, no. End of the month.
克雷默:不用,不,不,就月底。
JERRY: It's a bet. (They both "pinkie swear" to lock the deal)
杰瑞:好吧。(他们完成赌约)
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Manya's apartment]
(场景:曼雅家)
(Jerry sits between Uncle Leo and Elaine. Leo grabs his choulder)
(杰瑞坐在依莲和里奥叔之间,里奥抓住他的肩膀)
JERRY: Seriously, do you wnat to switch chairs?
杰瑞:说真的,你想换个位子吗?
ELAINE: No, no. I'm fine.
依莲:不,不,我没事。
LEO: Jerry, are you listening to this?
里奥:杰瑞,你在听我说吗?
JERRY: Yeah, Uncle Leo.
杰瑞:当然,里奥叔。
LEO: So, so, now the parks commissioner is recommending Jeffrey for a citation.
里奥:那么,那么,公园的长官推荐杰弗瑞作为嘉奖呢。
JERRY: Right. For reducing the pond scum?
杰瑞:是的,因为他减少了池塘里的污渍?
LEO: No, for the walking tours.
里奥:不,因为陪游。
JERRY: Oh, yeah. Where the people eat the plant life - the edible foliage tour.
杰瑞:哦,可不是嘛。人们可以吃植物——可食用叶片之旅。
LEO: That's exactly right. He knows the whole history of the park. For two hours he's talking and answering questions. But you want to know something? Whenever he has a problem with one of these high-powered big shots in the Parks Department, you know who he calls?
里奥:那确实!他对公园的历史了如指掌。连续两小时他介绍着并回答问题。有件事你知道吗?当他和那些公园的高管们有问题的时候你猜他会找谁求助?
JERRY: Mickey Mantle?
杰瑞:米奇.馒头?
ELAINE: (Helping him worm out of the conversation with Leo) Jerry, Jerry. Did you taste these peas? These peas are great!
依莲:(帮助杰瑞离开与里奥的谈话)杰瑞,杰瑞,你吃过这些豆豆吗?超好吃。
JERRY: (Eating a forkful) These peas are bursting with country-fresh flavor.
杰瑞:(吃了一勺)这些豌豆真是……带着田野的芬芳啊!
ELAINE: Mmm.. phenomenal peas..
依莲:嗯……神奇的豌豆……
MORTY: Are you ready for dessert?
莫蒂:你们想吃甜点了吗?
JERRY: Well, actually, we do have to kind of get going.
杰瑞:好啊,实际上,我们貌似要闪了。
MANYA: (Surprised) You're going?
曼雅:(惊奇状)你们要闪?
ELAINE: I don't really eat dessert. I'm dieting.
依莲:我都不怎么吃甜点的,我在节食。
JERRY: Yeah, I can't eat dessert either. The sugar makes my ankles swell up, and I can't dance.
杰瑞:是啊,我也不能吃甜点。糖让我的脚踝膨胀,那样我就不能跳舞了。
MANYA: Can't dance?
曼雅:不能跳舞?
HELEN: He's kidding, Manya.
海伦:他是开玩笑呢,曼雅。
MANYA: Is that a joke?
曼雅:这是个玩笑?
HELEN: (Canging subject) So, did you hear Claire's getting married?
海伦:(转移话题)那么,你听说克莱尔要结婚了吗?
MANYA: Yeah, yeah..
曼雅:是,是的。
HELEN: I hear the fella owns a couple of racehorses. You know, trotters, like at Yonkers.
海伦:我听说这家伙有些赛马。你知道的,快步马,就像在电影里的。
JERRY: Horses. They're like big riding dogs.
杰瑞:马。它们就像是大大的可以骑的狗狗。
ELAINE: What about ponies? What kind of abnormal animal is that? And those kids who had their own ponies..
依莲:那矮种马怎么样?这算是怎样一种变态的动物呀?那些拥有自己的马驹儿的孩子们。
JERRY: I know, I hated those kids. In fact, I hate anyone that ever had a pony when they were growing up.
杰瑞:我知道,我讨厌那种孩子。说实话,我憎恨那些在成长过程中有过马驹儿的人。
MANYA: ..I had a pony.
曼雅:……我有过马驹儿。
(The room is dead quiet)
(一片死寂)
JERRY: ..Well, I didn't really mean a pony, per se.
杰瑞:……好吧,我并不是真的说马驹儿,实际上。
MANYA: (Angry) When I was a little girl in Poland, we all had ponies. My sister had pony, my cousin had pony, ..So, what's wrong with that?
曼雅:(愤怒)当我还是个小姑娘,在波兰,我们都有马驹儿。我妹妹有,我表亲有……请问,有什么问题吗?
JERRY: Nothing. Nothing at all. I was just merely expressting..
杰瑞:没有……一点儿没有。我只是稍微说说……
HELEN: Should we have coffee? Who's having coffee?
海伦:我们是不是该来点咖啡啦?谁要咖啡?
MANYA: He was a beautiful pony! And I loved him.
曼雅:那是匹漂亮的马驹儿!我爱它!
JERRY: Well, I'm sure you did. Who wouldn't love a pony? Who wouldn't love a person that had a pony?
杰瑞:可不是吗,我肯定你是爱它的。有谁不爱一匹小马驹儿呢?谁会不爱有马驹儿的人呢?
MANYA: You! You said so!
曼雅:你!就是你自己说的!
JERRY: No, see, we didn't have ponies. I'm sure at the time in Poland, they were very common. They were probably like compact cars..
杰瑞:不,你看,我们没有马驹儿。我肯定在那时的波兰,这是很常见的。马驹儿就好像小型汽车一样。
MANYA: That's it! I've had enough! (She leaves the room)
曼雅:就这样啦!我受够了!(她离开房间)
ISAAC: Have your coffee, everyone. She's a little upset. It's been an emotional day.
伊萨克:喝你们的咖啡吧,朋友们。她有点不安,今天是个情绪化的日子呀。
(Isaac leaves, everyone looks at Jerry)
(伊萨克离开,人人看着杰瑞)
JERRY: I didn't know she had a pony. How was I to know she had a pony? Who figures an immigrant's going to have a pony? Do you know what the odds are on that? I mean, in all the pictures I saw of immigrants on boats coming into New York harbor, I never saw one of them sitting on a pony. Why would anybody come hre if they had a pony? Who leaves a country packed with ponies to come to a non-pony country? It doesn't make sense.. am I wrong?
杰瑞:我又不知道她有过马驹儿。我怎么会知道这个呢?谁能猜到一个移民会去养匹马驹儿?你知道这几率有多小吗?我是说,在我所有看到的有关那些移民在轮船上进入纽约港的时候,我从未见过有一个人坐在马驹儿上的。如果那些人有马驹儿的话为什么要过来这里?谁会离开一个满是马驹儿的国度来到这个没有马驹儿的地方?这没有道理嘛……难道我错了吗?
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Jerry's apartment]
(场景:杰瑞家)
(Morty and Helen are leaving, their bags are packed)
(莫蒂和海伦正要离开,已经打包好)
JERRY: I'll drive you to the airport.
杰瑞:我送你们去机场吧。
HELEN: No, we're taking a cab.
海伦:不,我们打车去。
JERRY: I just hope that whole pony incident didn't put a damper on the trip.
杰瑞:我只是希望整个“马驹儿”事件不会让你们这次来访败兴而归。
HELEN: Don't be rediculous. It was a misunderstanding.
海伦:开玩笑吧你。这只是误会罢了。
MORTY: Hey, I agree with him. Nobody likes a kid with a pony.
莫蒂:嗨,我同意我小子。没人喜欢有马驹儿的孩子。
JERRY: Well, if you ever talk to her, tell her I'm sorry. Elaine too. She feels terrible.
杰瑞:那么,如果你们有机会的话,向她表示我的歉意。还有依莲的歉意,她也感觉很不好。
HELEN: You know, you should give Manya a call.
海伦:你知道嘛,你该给曼雅去个电话。
JERRY: Maybe I will.
杰瑞:我也许会的。
(Jerry opens his door, Kramer's standing in the hallway)
(杰瑞开门,克雷默站在过道)
KRAMER: Oh, hi. I just came to say goodbye. (Gestures to the bags) ..Need any help with those?
克雷默:哦,嗨,我只是来道别的。(示意那些包包)……需要帮忙不?
MORTY: It's nothing. I got it. So, how are your levels coming along?
莫蒂:用不着,我行。那么,你的台阶怎么样了?
KRAMER: Oh, well.. I decided I'm not gonna do it.
克雷默:哦,嗯……我决定不做了。
JERRY: (Sarcastically) Really? What a shock.
杰瑞:(讽刺的)真的?令人震惊啊!
HELEN: Goodbye, Jerry.
海伦:再见,杰瑞。
JERRY: Take care.
杰瑞:保重。
HELEN: We'll call you. (Leaves)
海伦:我们会给你电话的。(离开)
MORTY: Bye, Jer.
莫蒂:再见,小杰。
JERRY: Bye, Dad. Take it easy.
杰瑞:再见,老爸。放松点。
MORTY: Bye, Mr. Kramer.
莫蒂:再见,克雷默君。
KRAMER: Yeah. So long, Morty. (Morty leaves)
克雷默:嗯。再会了。莫蒂。(莫蒂离开)
JERRY: So, when do I get my dinner?
杰瑞:那么,啥时请我吃饭?
KRAMER: There's no dinner. The bet's off. I'm not gonna do it.
克雷默:哪来什么饭?赌局取消了,我不干啦。
JERRY: Yes. I know you're not gonna do it. That's why I bet.
杰瑞:我就猜到你不会做,这就是我打赌的原因。
KRAMER: There's not bet if I' not doing it.
克雷默:我不做的话哪来的赌局?
JERRY: That's the bet! That you're not doing it!
杰瑞:可这就是赌的内容啊!赌你不会做!
KRAMER: Yeah, well, I could do it. I don't want to do it.
克雷默:是啊,好吧,我可以做,我只是不想做。
JERRY: We didn't bet on if you wanted to. We bet on if it would be done.
杰瑞:我们赌的不是你“想不想”做。我们赌的是做没做。
KRAMER: And it could be done.
克雷默:这是可以做的啊。
JERRY: Well, of course it could be done! Anything could be done! But it only is done if it's done. Show me the levels! The bet is the levels.
杰瑞:好吧,这当然是可以做!任何事情都可以完成!但只有当它完成的时候才能叫做完!给我看看台阶啊!赌局是关于台阶的。
KRAMER: But I don't want the levels!
克雷默:可是我不想要台阶!
JERRY: That's the bet! (Phone rings, Jerry answers it) Hello? ..No, oh, hi.. no, they just left.. Oh my God.. hand on a second. Maybe I can still catch them. (Jerry goes over to the window, and opens it. He yells out of it) Ma!.. Ma!.. Up here! Don't get in the cab! .. Manya died! ..Manya died!!
杰瑞:这就是赌局!(电话铃响,杰瑞接听)喂?不,哦,嗨……不,他们刚走……额滴神……等到。可能我还能赶上他们。(杰瑞走到窗边,打开,乱吼)老妈!!!上来!别进出租车!……曼雅死了……曼雅死了!!
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Jerry's apartment]
(场景:杰瑞家)
HELEN: Who did you talk to?
海伦:你和谁说话呢?
JERRY: Uncle Leo.
杰瑞:里奥叔。
HELEN: And when's the funeral?
海伦:葬礼是几时?
JERRY: I don't know. He said he'd call back.
杰瑞:我不知道,他说他会再打过来。
MORTY: You know what this means, don't you? We lost the supersaver. Those tickets are non-refundable.
莫蒂:你知道这意味着啥不?那些机票是不能退票的。
HELEN: She just had a check-up. The doctor said she was fine. Unless..
海伦:她刚刚检查过,医生说她还好。除非……
JERRY: What?
杰瑞:什么?
HELEN: What? Nothing.
海伦:什么?没什么。
JERRY: You don't think.. What? The pony remark?
杰瑞:你不认为……什么?马驹儿??
HELEN: Oh, don't be ridiculous. She was an old woman.
海伦:哦,别搞笑啦。她是个老女人。
JERRY: You don't think that I killed her?
杰瑞:你不是认为我“杀”了她吧?
MORTY: You know what the flight back'll cost us?
莫蒂:你知道机票的价钱吧?
JERRY: It was just an innocent comment! I didn't know she had a pony!
杰瑞:这可太冤枉啦!我又不知道她有过马驹儿!
MORTY: Maybe we can get an army transport flight. They got a base in Sarasota, I think.
莫蒂:可能我们可以转搭军用运输机。他们在萨拉索塔有个基地。
JERRY: The whole thing ws taking out of context. It was a joke. (Phone rings) That's probably Uncle Leo.
杰瑞:整件事有点断章取义吧!这只是个笑话!(电话铃响)可能是里奥叔的。
(Helen picks it up)
(海伦接听)
HELEN: Hello? ..Yes, I know.. Well, it's just one of those things.. Sure, sure, we'll see you then. (Hangs up) The funeral's Wednesday.
海伦:喂?是,我知道……好,尽是些倒霉事儿……行,没问题,再见。(挂断)葬礼在周三。
JERRY: Wednesday? What, what Wednesday?
杰瑞:周三?什么?哪个周三?
HELEN: Two o' clock, Wednesday. (Jerry shrugs) What?
海伦:2点钟,周三。(杰瑞耸肩)什么?
JERRY: I've got the softball game on Wednesday. It's the championship.
杰瑞:我周三有垒球比赛。这可是冠军赛!
HELEN: So? You're not obligated. Go play in your game.
海伦:怎样?你没有义务要去的。你去比你的球吧。
JERRY: I didn't even know the woman.
杰瑞:我压根都不怎么认识这女人。
HELEN: So don't go.
海伦:那就甭去。
JERRY: I mean I met her three times. I don't know her last name.
杰瑞:我是说我见了她三次,连她姓啥都不知道。
HELEN: Jery, no one's forcing you.
海伦:杰瑞,没人逼你。
JERRY: I mean, who has a funeral on a Wednesday? That's what I want to know. I mean, it's the championship. I'm hitting everything.
杰瑞:我是说,谁会在周三安排葬礼?这是我想知道的。我是说,这是冠军赛,我可是超级主力。
HELEN: I don't have a dress to wear. (To Morty) And you. You don't have anything.
海伦:我没有可穿的衣服。(对莫蒂)你,你啥都没有。
MORTY: I got a sport jacket.
莫蒂:我有运动夹克。
HELEN: You're not wearing that to a funeral.
海伦:你可不能穿这个去葬礼啊。
MORTY: What's wrong with it?
莫蒂:这又有什么问题?
HELEN: It looks ridiculous.
海伦:这看起来很可笑。
MORTY: What? I'm gonna buy a new jacket now?
莫蒂:什么?我还得买件新夹克?
JERRY: I don't know what to do.
杰瑞:我不知道该怎么办。
MORTY: ..You know what this funeral's gonna wind up costing me? Oh boy!
莫蒂:……你知道这葬礼得压榨掉我多少银子不?天啊……
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Night club]
(场景:俱乐部)
JERRY: We don't understand death. And the proof of this is that we give dead people a pillow. And, uh, I mean, hey, you know. I think if you can't stretch out and get some solid rest at that point, I don't see how bedding accessories really make the difference. I mean, they got the guy in a suit with a pillow. No is he going to a meeting, or is he catching forty winks? I mean, let's make up our mind where we think they're going.
杰瑞:我们不了解死亡。不然我们为啥要给亡故的人们一个枕头呢?还有,嗨,我是说,你知道的,我认为如果你都翘辫子了还不能安安稳稳的睡上一觉,我也不觉得那些床上用品能改变什么。他们把死人打扮得体、放个枕头,他是要去开会呢还是要打个盹儿?我们还是先搞搞清楚他们要去哪儿吧……
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Coffee Shop]
(场景:咖啡馆)
ELAINE: I actually like ponies. I was just trying to make conversation. What time's your game?
依莲:我其实是喜欢马驹儿的。我只是想打开话匣子。你比赛几点?
JERRY: Two Forty-Five.
杰瑞:2点3刻。
ELAINE: And what time's the funeral?
依莲:葬礼的时间呢?
JERRY: Two o' clock.
杰瑞:2点。
ELAINE: How long does a funeral take?
依莲:一个葬礼要多久?
JERRY: Depends on how nice the person was. But you gotta figure, even Oswald took forty-five minutes.
杰瑞:取决于这个死人人品怎么样啦。但你想想,就连兔子奥斯瓦尔德(的葬礼)都花了45分钟。
ELAINE: So you cna't do both?
依莲:就是你肯定不能都参加啦?
JERRY: You know, if the situation were reversed and Manya had some mah-jongg championship or something, I wouldn't expect her to go to my funeral. I would understand.
杰瑞:哎呀,要是事情反过来,曼雅由于要参加类似麻将大赛之类的东西,我也不指望她来参加我的葬礼啊,我能理解的。
ELAINE: How can you even consider not going?
依莲:你居然会考虑不去?
GEORGE: You know, I've been thinking.. I cannot envision any circumstances in which I'll ever have the opportunity to have sex again. How's it gonna happen? I just don't see how it could occur.
乔治:你知道的,我曾想过……我无法想象我将失去交欢的机会。这怎么会发生的?我根本看不到这事情会发生。
ELAINE: You know, funerals always make me think about my own mortality and how I'm actually going to die someday. Me, dead. Imagine that.
依莲:你知道的,葬礼总是让我想到自己总是难免一死。我,死亡,难以想象。
GEORGE: They always make me take stock of my life and how I've pretty much wasted all of it, and how I plan to continue wasting it.
乔治:他们总是对我的人生评头论足,说我怎样荒废了我的人生、并且还将继续荒废下去。
JERRY: I know, and then you say to yourself, "From this moment on, I'm not going to waste any more of it." But then you go, "How? What can I do that's not wasting it?"
杰瑞:我知道,然后你就对自己说:“从此刻起,我将不再浪费我的生命”。可你又说:“怎样做呢?该怎么做才能不浪费生命呢?”
ELAINE: Is this a waste of time? What should we be doing? Can't you hae coffee with people?
依莲:这不是浪费时间嘛?我们该干什么呢?你难道连咖啡都不能喝了?
GEORGE: You know, I can't believe you're even considering not playing. We need you. You're hitting everything.
乔治:你知道的,我无法相信你居然会考虑不参加比赛。我们需要你,你可是超级球员。
ELAINE: He has to go. He may have killed her.
依莲:他必须去。要知道可能就是他“杀”了曼雅。
JERRY: Me? What about you? You brought up the pony.
杰瑞:我?你怎么不说自己?就是你提出的马驹儿话题。
ELAINE: Oh, yeah, but I didn't say I hated anyone who had one.
依莲:哦,是啊,不过我可没说我讨厌有马驹儿的人。
GEORGE: (To Jerry) Who's going to play left field?
乔治:(对杰瑞)谁将出任左外野手的位置?
JERRY: Bender.
杰瑞:本德。
GEORGE: Bender? He can't play left. He stinks. I just don't see what purpose is it going to serve your going? I mean, you think dead peole care who's at the funeral? They don't even know they're having a funeral. It's not like she's hanging out in the back going, "I can't believe Jerry didn't show up."
乔治:本德?他怎么能打左外野?他烂透了。我只是不明白你去(葬礼)又有什么意义呢?我是说,你认为亡故的人会在乎谁来他的葬礼吗?他们甚至都不知道自己会有个葬礼。你还以为她会漂浮在你身后说着,难以置信杰瑞居然没来。
ELAINE: Maybe she's there in spirit. How about that?
依莲:搞不好她的魂灵真的在哦!那会怎样?
GEORGE: If you're a spirit, and you can travel to other dimensions and galaxies, and find out the mysteries of the universe, you think she's going to want to hang around Drexler's funeral home on Ocean Parkway?
乔治:如果你是个魂灵的话,你可以去异次元空间或银河系旅行,去探索宇宙的奥秘,你认为她会无聊到去海洋街的德氏殡仪馆?
ELAINE: George, I met this woman! She is not traveling to any other dimensions.
依莲:乔治,我见过这个女人!她可不会去什么其他空间旅游!
GEORGE: You know how easy it is for dead people to travel? It's not like getting on a bus. One second. It's all mental.
乔治:你是不知道对死人来说旅行有多容易吗?这又不像要去坐巴士。分秒的事情。全是精神层面的。
JERRY: Fifty years they were married. Now he's moving to Pheonix.
杰瑞:他们结婚50年了,现在他要搬去凤凰城了。
ELAINE: Phoenix? What's happening with his appartment?
依莲:凤凰城?他的寓所怎么了?
JERRY: I don't know. They've been in there since, like, World War II. The rent's three hundred a month.
杰瑞:我不知道,他们貌似从二战起就住那儿了吧,租金可要300美金一个月。
ELAINE: Three hundred a month? Oh my God.
依莲:300?!?!?额滴神。
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Funeral home]
(场景:殡仪馆)
(The eulogy is in progress. Jerry attended afterall)
(悼词念叨中,杰瑞最终还是参加了)
MAN: Although this may seem like a sad even, it should not be a day of mourning.. for Manya had a rich, fulfilling life. She grew up in a different world - a simpler world - with loving parents, a beautiful home in the country, and from what I understand, she eve had a pony.. (Jerry throws his hands up) Oh, how she loved that pony. Even in her declining years, whenever she would speak of it, her eyes would light up. It's lustrous coat, it's flowing mane. It was the pride of Krakow. (Jery sinks in his seat)
念悼词:尽管这看起来是个伤感的时刻,但别让今天变成悲痛的日子。因为曼雅的人生是丰富而圆满的。她在一个和我们不同的世界里长大——一个更简单的世界——有慈爱的父母,一个乡村里美丽的家,据我所知,她有过一匹马驹儿……(杰瑞崩溃了)哦,她很爱那马驹儿。即使在她风烛残年之际,每当谈起马驹儿,她都会眼里放光。有光泽的皮毛,光亮的鬃毛。它是克拉科夫的荣耀。(杰瑞陷在他的座位上)
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Anteroom of funeral parlor]
(场景:殡仪馆前厅)
JERRY: (Looking at his watch) Well, the game's starting just about now.
杰瑞:(看手表)瞧瞧,比赛正要开打。
HELEN: It was good that the two of you came. It was a nice gesture.
海伦:你们俩能过来真好。这才叫有礼貌。
(Scene cuts to Morty talking to an intern)
(莫蒂与实习医生聊天)
INTERN: I'm not a doctor yet, Uncle Morty. I'm just an intern. I can't write a note to an airline.
实习医生:我还不是医生呢,莫蒂叔。我只是实习的,我不能给航空公司写条子。
MORTY: You've got your degree. They don't care. They just want to see something.
莫蒂:你有你的学历啊。他们才不在乎呢。他们只是想看到点什么东西。
(Scene cuts back to Jerry)
JERRY: (To Isaac) I just wanted to say how sorry I was..
杰瑞:(对伊萨克)我只想说我万分抱歉……
LEO: (Interrupting) Jerry, you wanna hear something? Your cousin, Jeffrey, is switching parks. They're transferring him to Riverside - so he'll completely revamp that operation, you understand? He'll do in Riverside what he did in Central Park. It's more money. So, that's your cousin.
里奥:(打断)杰瑞,你想听听我的意见吗?你的表弟,杰弗瑞,要换公园了。他们要调他去河畔——他就能整个的改进那个行动了,你了解吗?他会将他在中央公园的行为带到河畔区。更多钱,所以了,这就是你的表弟。
(Scene cuts back to Morty)
MORTY: You don't understand, I've never paid a full fare.
莫蒂:你不理解,我从没付过全额。
JERRY: (To Isaac) Once again, I just want to say how sorry I am abou tthe other night.
杰瑞:(对伊萨克)对那天晚上的事情我表示再次的歉意。
ELAINE: Oh, me too.
依莲:哦,我也是。
ISAAC: Oh no, no, no. She forgot all about that. She was much mor upset about the potato salad.
伊萨克:哦,别,别。她早忘了那些,她对土豆沙拉都要更心烦意乱一点呢。
ELAINE: So, I understand you're moving to Phoenix?
依莲:那么,你要搬去凤凰城是因为?
(Jerry shake his head and walks away)
(杰瑞摇摇手、离开)
ISAAC: Yeah, my brother lives there. I think Manya would've liked Phoenix.
伊萨克:是啊,我兄弟住那儿。我想曼雅可能会喜欢凤凰城的。
ELAINE: Mmm.. gorgeous, exquisite town. Who, what's happening with your apartment?
依莲:嗯……美丽、精致的地方。那你的公寓怎样啦?
ISAAC: Of course it's very hot there. I'l lhave to get an air conditioner.
伊萨克:当然啦,那里很热。我得配台空调。
ELAINE: Oh, you can have mine. I'll ship it out ot you.. but what about that big apartment on West End Avenue?
依莲:哦,你把我的拿去吧。我会把空调给你运过去。那你西街的豪宅怎么处理?
ISAAC: Although they say it's a dry heat.
伊萨克:尽管人们都说是干热。
ELAINE: Dry, wet.. what's happening with your apartment?
依莲:干燥,潮湿……你的公寓到底怎样了嘛?
ISAAC: I don't even know if I should take my winter clothing.
伊萨克:我都不知道我是否需要带我的冬装过去。
ELAINE: I have an idea. Leave the winter clothing in the apartment, and I'll watch it for you and I'll live there and I'll make sure that nothing happens to it.
依莲:我有个主意,把冬装留在这儿的公寓里,我会替你看着的,我会住在你的公寓、确保万无一失的。
(Jerry comes back)
ISAAC: Oh, the apartment. Jeffrey's taking the apartment.
伊萨克:哦,公寓,杰弗瑞会住这公寓。
ELAINE: (to Jerry) Oh, Jeffrey.
依莲:(对杰瑞)哦,杰弗瑞。
JERRY: (To Elaine) You know Jeffery?
杰瑞:(对依莲)你认识杰弗瑞?
ELAINE: Yeah, from what I understand, he works for the Parks Department.
依莲:是啊,据我所知,他在公园管理处工作。
(Helen approaches Jerry)
HELEN: It's raining.
海伦:在下雨呢。
JERRY: (Moves to the window) It's raining? It's raining. The game will be postponed. We'll play tomarrow.
杰瑞:(到窗口)下雨了?嗯,是在下雨。比赛应该延迟了,我们明天再打。
(Scene cuts back to Morty)
MORTY: Believe me, I wouldn't bother you if the army hadn't closed that base in Sarasota. Here, scribble a little something here.
莫蒂:相信我,要不是军方关闭了萨拉索塔基地,我才不会来麻烦你呢。就随便写点什么嘛。
INTERN: I can't. I'll get in trouble.
实习医生:不行,我会有麻烦的。
MORTY: Oh, for God's sakes!
莫蒂:哦。看在上帝的份上!行行好吧!
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Coffee Shop]
(场景:咖啡馆)
GEORGE: Who gets picked off in softball? It's unheard of.
乔治:有谁在垒球比赛中被截杀出局的?从没听说过。
JERRY: It's never happend to me before.
杰瑞:我也从未遇到过。
ELAINE: I remember saying to myself, "Why is Jerry so far off the base?"
依莲:我对自己说,“为什么杰瑞离垒包那么远?”
JERRY: I'll have to live with this shame for the rest of my life.
杰瑞:这个臭名将伴随我的余生了。
GEORGE: And they in the fifth inning, why did you take off on the pop fly?
乔治:在第五局的时候,你为什么要对那个高飞球作出反应啊?
JERRY: I thought there were two outs.
杰瑞:我以为只有两个出局的。
ELAINE: I couldn't believe it when I saw you running. I thought maybe they had changed the rules or something.
依莲:看到你跑的时候我都不敢相信。我还以为是他们更改了规则啥的呢。
JERRY: It was the single worst moment of my life.
杰瑞:这是我有生以来最差的一刻。
GEORGE: What about Sharon Besser?
乔治:莎朗.贝斯儿的事情怎么算?
JERRY: Oh, well, of course. 1973.
杰瑞:哦,好吧,当然,1973.
ELAINE: Makes you wonder, though, doesn't it?
依莲:让你很惊异对吧?呵呵
JERRY: Wonder about what?
杰瑞:惊异什么?
ELAINE: You know.. the spirit world.
依莲:你知道的呀……魂灵的世界……
JERRY: You think Manya showed up during the game and put a hex on me?
杰瑞:你认为难不成曼雅出现在比赛中,给我来了那么一下子?
ELAINE: I never saw anyone play like that.
依莲:我从没见过有人像你这次这么打球的。
JERRY: But I went ot the funeral.
杰瑞:可是我去了葬礼呀。
ELAINE: Yeah, but that doesn't make up for killing her.
依莲:是,可是那并不能弥补你杀了她的罪错啊。
GEORGE: Maybe Manya missed the funeral because she was off visiting another galaxy that day.
乔治:可能曼雅并没有“出席”葬礼,她在那天去另一个银河系旅游了。
JERRY: Don't you think she would've heard I was there?
杰瑞:你认为她就没有“听说”我去葬礼啦?
GEORGE: Not necessarily. (Elaine laughs)
乔治:那可不一定。(依莲笑)
JERRY: Who figures and immigrant's gonna have a pony?
杰瑞:谁曾料想一个移民会有马驹儿。
(Scene ends)
[Setting: Night Club]
(场景:俱乐部)
JERRY: What is the pony? What is the point of the pony? Why do we have these animals, these ponies? What do we do with them? Besides the pony ride. Why ponies? What are we doing with them? I mean, police don't use them for, you know, crowd control. "Hey, uh, you wanna get back behind the barricades. Hey! Hey, little boy. Yeah, I'm talking to you. Behind the barricades!" So somebody, I assume, genetically engineered these ponies. Do you think they could make them any size? I mean, could they make them like the size of a quarter, if they wanted? That would be fun for Monopoly, though, wouldn't it? Just have a little pony and you put him on the, "Baltic, that's two down, go ahead. Hold it. Right ther, Baltic. yeah, that's it. Fine. Right there, hold it right there."
杰瑞:马驹儿是什么东东?马驹儿有什么特殊意义?我们为什么要拥有这些动物,马驹儿?我们拿它们干什么?除了骑以外。为什么是马驹儿?我们在用它们做什么?我是说,警察不用马驹儿来维持秩序。“嗨,你最好到路障后面去!嗨!嗨,小朋友!是,说你呢!路障后头!”然后某些人,我假设,从基因上改造了这些马驹儿。你认为他们可以把马驹儿的“尺寸”变一下,比如搞成和个硬币一样大小,如果他们愿意的话?那玩起强手棋来就有意思了,可不是嘛?拿起一个“小马驹儿”,放在上头,“巴尔蒂克,走2步,走着,停,就停那儿,巴尔蒂克,是啊,就这样。很好。就这样,停那儿。
END OF SHOW.
March 13

Seinfeld S2 EP01

1991年1月23日
第二季第一集
前女友

Plot summary for "Seinfeld" The Ex-Girlfriend
Jerry begins seeing George's ex-girlfriend, Marlene, whom George finds altogether annoying. Jerry wants to break up with Marlene but can't because she has a "psychosexual hold" on him. Marlene then breaks up with Jerry after seeing his comedy act. George is angry over a huge chiropractor bill, which he argues that he shouldn't have to pay for.

情节概要:
杰瑞开始和乔治的前女友——马尔琳约会,乔治很不爽。杰瑞也想要分手,可是马尔琳在心“性”上控制了他。不过在看过杰瑞的喜剧表演后马尔琳主动提出分手。乔治对医疗按摩的收费很不满,他认为他不该付这笔钱。

[Setting: Nightclub]
(场景:俱乐部)
JERRY: I'm always in traffic with the lane expert. You know this type of person? Constantly reevaluating their lane choice.. Never quite sure, "Is this the best lane for me? For my life?" They're always a little bit ahead of you, "Can I get in over there? Could I get in over here? Could I get in there?" "Yeah, come on over here, pal. We're zoomin' over here. This is the secret lane, nobody knows about it.." The ultimate, I think the ultimate psychological test of traffic is the total dead stop. Not even rolling. And you look out the window, you can see gum clearly. So we know that in the future traffic will get even worse than that. I mean, what will happen? Will it start moving backwords, I wonder? I mean, is that possible? That someday we'll be going "Boy, this is some really bad traffic now, boy. This, is really bad. I'm gonna try to get off and get back on going the other way."
杰瑞:我总是在堵塞的状况里遇到“变线专家”。你知道这类人吗?不停的研究在路线上的选择……永远不确定,“这是我的最佳线路吗?我的人生之路?”而他们总是在你们前面晃荡,“我能变到那条线吗?或是这条线?”“是的,请来这条路吧,我们在这条路上飞奔,这是条秘道,一般人进不来。”我想交通堵塞中,给人带来终极的心理压力的情况是一动不动。滚都滚不动。往车窗外看,你都能看见牙龈(有误)。我们都知道了,将来交通状况还会更差。天,那将是什么情况啊?也许某天我们只能这样:“唉,交通状况真差啊,额滴神,太糟糕了!我都想倒回去了。”
[Setting: Jerry's car]
(场景:杰瑞车中)
GEORGE: She can't kill me right?!
乔治:她不会杀了我对吧?
JERRY: No, of course not.
杰瑞:不,当然不会啊。
GEORGE: People break up all the time.
乔治:人们总是在分手的。
JERRY: Everyday.
杰瑞:每天都是。
GEORGE: It just didn't work out. What can I do? I wanted to love her. I tried to love her. I couldn't.
乔治:这感情反正是行不通了。我能怎么办?我也想爱她的啊,我尽量去爱她了啊,我就是不能啊。
JERRY: You tried.
杰瑞:你尽力了。
GEORGE: I kept looking at her face. I'd go: "C'mon, love her. Love her!"
乔治:我保持着凝视她的脸,心想:加油!爱她!爱她!
JERRY: Did you tell her you loved her?
杰瑞:你告诉过她你爱她吗?
GEORGE: Oh, I had no choice. She squeezed it out of me! She'd tell me she loved me. Alright, at first, I just look at her. I'd go "Oh, really?" or "Boy, that's, that's something." But, eventually you have to come back with "Well, I love you." You know, you can only hold out for so long!"
乔治:哦,我别无选择。她逼人太甚!她说过她爱我,好吧,刚开始时,我只是看着她,琢磨着“哦,真的吗?”或者“天,真不错啊!”但是,最终还是会回到“好吧,我爱你。”你知道你也只能坚持这么久了。
JERRY: You're a human being.
杰瑞:你也是个凡人。
GEORGE: And I didn't even ask her out. She asked me out first. She called me up. What was I supposed to do? Say no? I can't do that to someone.
乔治:我甚至都没有邀请她出来过。都是她主动邀请我。她打电话给我,我能怎么做?说不?我不能对别人这样。
JERRY: You're too nice a guy.
杰瑞:你是个好人。
GEORGE: I am. I'm a nice guy.. (realizing) And she seduced me! We were in my apartment, I'm sitting on the couch, she's on the chair - I get up to go to the bathroom, I come back, she's on the couch. What am I supposed to do? Not do anything? I couldn't do that. I would've insulted her.
乔治:我是,我是个好人……(意识到)是她在诱惑我!我们在我的公寓,我坐在沙发上,她在椅子上,我起身去洗手间,我回来,她坐在沙发上。我能怎么做?啥都不做?我可不能这样!那不是侮辱她嘛。
JERRY: You're flesh and blood.
杰瑞:你只是血气方刚。
GEORGE: I had nothing to do wtih any of this! I met all her friends, I didn't want to meet them. I kept trying to avoid it. I knew it would only get me in deeper. But they were everywhere! They kept popping up, all over the place. "This is Nancy, this is Susan, this is Amy.. This is my cousin.. this is my brother.. thisis my father." It's like I'm in quicksand.
乔治:我与整件事情无关!我见过她所有的朋友,可我压根不想见他们。我一直避免这个。我知道这些只会让我越陷越深。可是他们无处不在!他们不停的跳出来,任何地方……“这是南希,这是苏珊,这是阿美……这是我表亲……这是我兄弟……这是我老爸!”我就像陷入流沙一样……
JERRY: I told you when I met her..
杰瑞:我早就跟你说过的。
GEORGE: My back is killing me.
乔治:我的背痛死了。
JERRY: You gotta go to my chiropractor, he's the best.
杰瑞:你得去看看我的按摩医生,他很棒。
GEORGE: Oh yeah, everybody's guy is the best.
乔治:哦,每个人的都是最棒的。
JERRY: I'm gonna make an appointment for you. We'll go together.
杰瑞:我给你安排个预约,我们一起去。
GEORGE: Please. They don't do anything.. Look, do I have to break up with her in person? CAn't I do it over the phone? I have no stomach for these things.
乔治:得了吧。他们啥效果也起不到……你说我们必须面对面的分手嘛?还是我可以通过电话?我可没胆面对面的说。
JERRY: You should just do it like a Band-Aid. One motion! Right off!
杰瑞:你就该像撕掉邦迪一样,爽快点!快刀斩乱麻!
(Car door opens, it's Elaine)
(车门开,依莲)
ELAINE: Hi.
依莲:嗨。
JERRY: Hi.
杰瑞:嗨。
(George pulls his seat forward to allow Elaine into the back seats)
(乔治座位前移,依莲入后座)
ELAINE: Hey, what are you doing?
依莲:嗨,你们在干啥呢?
GEORGE: I'm letting you in.
乔治:我在让你进车啊。
ELAINE: Oh no. No. I don't want to sit in the back. I'll be left out of the conversation.
依莲:哦,不,不,我不要坐后排,那样我会被排斥在你们的谈话外的。
GEORGE: No, you won't.
乔治:不,你不会的。
ELAINE: Yes, I will, George. I'll have to sick my chin on top of the seat.
依莲:会,我会的,乔治。我坐定那个位子了。
GEORGE: Okay..
乔治:好吧……
(George gets out, and gestures for Elaine to sit in the seat)
(乔治出,示意依莲坐前座)
ELAINE: Why can't you sit in the middle?
依莲:你为什么不坐在中间呢?
GEORGE: Please, it doesn't look good. Boy, boy, girl.
乔治:求你了,这多难看啊。天,天,女人……
ELAINE: I think you're afraid to sit next to a man. You're a little homophobic, aren't you?
依莲:我认为你害怕坐在男人边上。你有点“恐同”,对吧?
GEORGE: Is it that obvious?
乔治:明摆着的事嘛。
(Elaine sits in the middle)
(依莲坐在中间)
ELAINE: Hello, Jerry.
依莲:好啊,杰瑞。
JERRY: Hello.
杰瑞:好。
ELAINE: Did you get a haircut?
依莲:你剪过头发啦?
JERRY: No, shower. So, where are we eating?
杰瑞:没有,洗澡而已。那么,我们吃点啥?
ELAINE: Tell me if you think this is strange: There's this guy who lives in my building, who I was introduced to a couple of years ago by a friend. He's a teacher, or something. Anyway, after we met, whenever we'd run into each other on the street, or in the lobby, or whatever, we would stop and we would chat a little.. Nothing much. Little pleasantries. He was a nice guy, he's got a family.. then after a while, I noticed there was not more stopping. Just saying hello and continuing on our way. And then the verbal hellos stopped, and we just went into these little sort of nods of recognition. So, fine. I figure, that's where this relationship is finally gonna settle: polite nodding. Then one day, he doesn't nod. Like I don't exist?! He went from nods to nothing.
依莲:你倒是说说这事怪不:有个家伙和我同住一幢楼的,几年前一个朋友介绍我们认识过。他是个老师,之类的吧。反正,我们认识后,每次在街上还是楼下的大堂碰到,我们都会听下来闲扯几句。没什么正事,就一些寒暄之类的。他是个不错的家伙,他有家室了。然后过了一阵子,我发现我们不再听下来闲扯了。只是说你好就各走各路了。再接下来就连你好也不说了,只是点头示意一下罢了。那好吧,我以为,这就算是我们关系的最终格局了:点头之交。可接下来一次,他点头都不点了。好像我不存在一样!从点头之交变成了形同陌路。
GEORGE: (imitating Tony Bennett) "You know, I'd go from nods to nothing.."
乔治:(模仿托尼.本内特)“你知道的,我从点头到啥也不做……”
ELAINE: And now, there's this intense animosity whenever we passs. I mean, it's like we really hate each other. It's based on nothing.
依莲:现在就好像我们每次经过的时候都有种仇恨的情绪在蔓延。我是说,就好像我们真的恨对方一样,而其实啥都没有。
JERRY: A relationship is an organism. You created this thing and then you starved it so it turned against you. Same thing happened to The Blob.
杰瑞:一段关系就像个有机体一样。你创造出来,然后你饿着它,他就反戈相向。和电影《The Blob》里面一样。
GEORGE: I think you absolutely have to say something to this guy. Confront him.
乔治:我觉得你必须得对他说点啥吧,和他对质。
ELAINE: Really?
依莲:真的吗?
GEORGE: Yes.
乔治:是啊。
ELAINE: You would do that?
依莲:你会这么做?
GEORGE: If I was a different person.
乔治:要是我是其他人的话。
(Scene ends)

[Setting: Jerry's apartment; Jerry's on the phone]
(场景:杰瑞家,杰瑞在电话中)
JERRY: Hello.. hello. Is Glenn there? I'm sorry. Is this 805-555-3234?.. Yes, I know I have the wrong number. But I just want to know if I dialed wrong or if..
杰瑞:喂……喂,格伦在吗?不好意思,是805-555-3234吗?是,我知道我号码错了,我只是想知道是我拨错了还是……
(Other guy hangs up on Jerry; he redials; enter Kramer)
(对方挂断,杰瑞重拨,克雷默进)
(The buzzer buzzes; Kramer answers it)
(门铃响,克雷默应答)
KRAMER: Come on up.
克雷默:上来吧。
JERRY: (Into phone) Oh, it's you again. See? Now if you had answered me, I wouldn't have had to do this. Now that's too long distance calls I made to you why can't you.. (guy hangs up on Jerry again). (To Kramer) Why? Why do they just hang up like that?! Thank you very much.
杰瑞:(电话)哦,又是你。看见了吧?如果你刚才回答我,我就不用再打给你了。又是个长途,你就不能……(对方又挂断)(对克雷默)为什么?为什么他又挂我电话?!非常感谢。
(Kramer holds up cantaloupe)
(克雷默拿着个甜瓜)
KRAMER: Taste this.
克雷默:尝尝!
JERRY: No, I just had a sandwich.
杰瑞:谢谢,我刚吃过三明治。
KRAMER: No, taste it. Taste it.
克雷默:尝尝,就尝一下吧!
JERRY: I don't want cantaloupe now.
杰瑞:我现在不想吃甜瓜。
KRAMER: You've never had cantaloupe like this before.
克雷默:你肯定没有吃过这么好的甜瓜。
JERRY: I only eat cantaloupe at certain times.
杰瑞:我只在特定的时间吃甜瓜。
KRAMER: Jerry. This is great cantaloupe.
克雷默:杰瑞,这可是很棒的甜瓜啊!
JERRY: Alright.. (tastes it)
杰瑞:好吧……(尝了一下)
KRAMER: Ah, huh. It's good?
克雷默:哦,是恨不错吧?
JERRY: It's very good.
杰瑞:相当好吃。
KRAMER: Good, huh?
克雷默:好吃,对吧?
JERRY: Good.
杰瑞:好吃。
KRAMER: I got it at Joe's.
克雷默:是乔家水果店的。
JERRY: Uh-Huh.
杰瑞:哦。
KRAMER: Forty-nine cents a pound. That's practically half than what you're paying at the supermarket. I don't know why you don't go to Joe's.
克雷默:一磅49美分。只是超市价的一半哦。我就不知道你为啥抵制乔家水果。
JERRY: It's too far.
杰瑞:太远了。
KRAMER: It's three blocks further. You can use my shopping cart..
克雷默:只是再过去3个街区而已。你能用我的购物车。
JERRY: I'm not pulling a shopping cart. What am I suppose to wear? A kerchief? Put stockings on and roll 'em down below my knee?
杰瑞:我是不会用你的购物车了。我该穿啥?围巾?车边挂着袜子,然后骑着它?
KRAMER: See, the other thing is, if you don't like anything, he takes it right back.
克雷默:你要不喜欢的话就别拿着了。
JERRY: I don't return fruit. Fruit is a gamble. I know that going in.
杰瑞:我不把水果送回去的,水果就像是赌博。就那么回事。
(Enter George; he's extremely excited - he's dancing around the room, singing the Zorba theme)
(乔治兴高采烈近来,在屋子里打转,唱歌)
GEORGE: I'm outta there. I did it! It's over.
乔治:我要离开这里,我成功了!一切都结束啦。
JERRY: You did it? What happened?
杰瑞:你成功了?发生啥事了?
GEORGE: I told her. In the kitchen - which was risky 'cause it's near all the knives. I started with the word "Listen."
乔治:我告诉她了。在厨房——考虑到周围全是刀具,还是很危险的。我的开场词是:听着……
JERRY: Ah ha.
杰瑞:啊哈。
GEORGE: I said, "Listen Marlene," and then the next thing I know, I'm in the middle of it. And there's this voice inside of me going: "You're doing it! You're doing it!" And then she started to cry, and I weakened a bit. I almost relented, but the voice, Jerry. The voice said "Keep going, keep going. You're almost out!" It's like I was making a prison break, you know. And I'm heading for the wall, and I trip and I twist my ankle, and they throw the light on you, you know. So, somehow I get though the crying and I keep running. Then the cursing started. She's firing at me from the guard tower: "Son of a bang! Son of a boom!" I get to the top of the wall - the front door. I opened it up, I'm one foot away, I took one last look around the penitentiary, and I jumped!
乔治:我说:“听着,马尔琳”,接下来我所知道的就是我开始了。然后脑海里一个声音在说:你正在做!你正在和她分手!然后她就开始哭泣,我有点退缩。我差不多就要放弃了,但是那个声音,杰瑞。那个声音在说:“加油,坚持住,你差不多就成功了!”这就像我在越狱一样,你知道嘛,我正在冲向围墙,我爬上去、崴了脚,探照灯照向我!突然间,我逃离了她眼泪的牢笼、继续奔跑。然后那个诅咒又来了。她在看守塔楼上调戏我,狗娘养的。(不太理解)我爬到墙头,到了前门,打开大门,只有一步之遥啦,我再最后看了一眼监狱,然后,我跳了出去!
JERRY: See, it's never as bad as you imagine.
杰瑞:看见了吧,不像你想的那么坏吧。
KRAMER: I liked Marlene. What's her number?
克雷默:我喜欢马尔琳,她的电话是?
GEORGE: No, I, I don't think so.
乔治:省省吧,你TMD少来。
(Kramer stants making noises while eating)
(克雷默吃出声音)
JERRY: Could you stop that smacking?
杰瑞:麻烦你别发出这种声音好不?
KRAMER: George, I want you to taste this cantaloupe.
克雷默:乔治,我要你尝一下这甜瓜。
GEORGE: Oh no, thank you.
乔治:哦,不,谢谢。
KRAMER: It's the best cantaloupe I ever had.
克雷默:这可是我吃过的最好的甜瓜啦。
GEORGE: No, really. No, no, thanks.
乔治:不,真的,不,不,谢啦。
KRAMER: Jerry, tell him how good this cantaloupe is.
克雷默:杰瑞,告诉他这甜瓜有多好。
JERRY: It's very good cantaloupe. (changing subject) So that's it? You're out?
杰瑞:这是很好的甜瓜。(换话题)那就这样啦,你就脱离感情的束缚啦?
GEORGE: Except for one small problem. I left some books in her apartment.
乔治:还有个小尾巴,我在她家落下几本书。
JERRY: So, go get them.
杰瑞:那么,去拿回来呗。
GEORGE: Oh, no. No, I can't go back there. Jerry, it's so awkward and, you know, it could be dangerous - sexually. Something could happen, I'd be right back where I started.
乔治:哦,不,不,我不能再去那里。杰瑞,这很尴尬的,你知道的,还很危险——性的诱惑。可能会发生什么的,我又会回到原点啦。
JERRY: So forget about the books. Did you read them?
杰瑞:那就忘了这些书吧,你要看?
GEORGE: Well, yeah.
乔治:是的。
JERRY: What do you need them for?
杰瑞:你要这些书干嘛?
GEORGE: I don't know. They're books.
乔治:我不知道,可那是书啊。
JERRY: What is this obsession people have with books? They put them in their houses - like they're trophies. What do you need it for after you read it?
杰瑞:真搞不懂有些人这么迷恋书本。他们把书放到屋子里——就好像他们的战利品似的。真不知道看完后还有什么用。
GEORGE: They're MY books.
乔治:可那是我的书!
JERRY: So you want me to get those books? Is that it?
杰瑞:难道你想要我去取回这些书?你是这意思?
(Scene ends)

[Setting: Coffee Shop]
(场景:咖啡馆)
(Jerry and Marlene are sitting, a pile of books are on the table.)
(杰瑞和马尔琳坐着,放着一堆书)
MARLENE: ..So, it must've been ninety-five degrees that night, and everyone's just standing around the pool with little drinks in their hands. I was wearing my old jeans and T-shirt. And I don't know, I was just in one of those moods - so I said to myself, "Marlene, just do it," and I jumped in. And as I'm getting out, I feel all these eyes on me, and I look up and everyone is just staring at me.
马尔琳:……那晚大概有95度的高温,每个人都拿着酒在游泳池旁站着。我穿着旧牛仔和T裇衫,突然间不知道为什么,我就来了情绪了,我对自己说:马尔琳,去做吧。我就跳了下去。当我出来时,我感觉所有的目光都集中在我身上,我就坦然迎接这种目光。
JERRY: So what'd you do?
杰瑞:你做啥啦?
MARLENE: Well, nothing. It's not skin off my hide if people like to look. I just didn't see what the big attraction was.
马尔琳:实际上也没啥。不就是我的身材在湿漉漉的衣服里面呼之欲出嘛,就啥大不了的。
JERRY: Well, I have a general idea what it was. I could take a guess.
杰瑞:呵呵,我能猜出个大概来。
MARLENE: (Laughs) Hey, you know, Jerry, just because George and I don't see each other anymore, it doesn't mean we shouldn't stay friends.
马尔琳:(笑)嗨,你知道嘛,杰瑞,虽然我和乔治分手了,但我和你还可以是朋友吧?
JERRY: No.
杰瑞:当然。
MARLENE: Good enough. I'm really glad we got that settled.
马尔琳:很好。很高兴都处理好了。
(Scene ends)

[Setting: Chiropractor waiting room]
(场景:按摩理疗等候室)
JERRY: (Irritated) I don't know how this happened.
杰瑞:(激怒状)不知道这是怎么发生的。
GEORGE: Jerry, it's not my fault.
乔治:杰瑞,这不是我的问题。
JERRY: No, no. It's not your fault. Books, books, I need my books. Have you re-read those books yet, by the way? You know the great thing? When you read Moby Dick the second time, Ahab and the whale become good friends. You know, it's not like Marlene's a bad person or anything, but, my God! I mean, we've had like three lunches and a movie. And she never stops calling. (George nods - he knows exactly what Jerry's talking about) And it's these meaningless, purposeless, blather calls. She never asks if I'm busy or anything. I just pick up the phone and she's in the middle of a sentence.
杰瑞:不,不,不是你的问题。书,书,我需要我的书。顺便问一句,你有没有再度光临一下你的“书”啊?你知道好玩的是啥吗?当你第二次读《大白鲸》时,你会发现啊哈和白鲸成了好朋友呢。要知道,这可不是因为马尔琳的个性不好或什么,但是,额滴神啊!我们已经共进了三次午餐和一部电影,她还不停的骚扰我。(乔治点头,他了解杰瑞说的话)还有这些无聊的、漫无边际的废话电话。她从不问我是否在忙其他事啊。我拿起电话,她就已经打开话茬了。
GEORGE: That's standard. Has she left you one of those messages where she uses up the whole machine?
乔治:这很附和程序。她是不是给你答录机留言,一个留言就占据你机器的全部空间的那种?
JERRY: Ohh.. you know, and sometimes she'll go, "Hello, Jerry?" and I'll go "Oh, hi Marlene." And then it's "Jerry.."
杰瑞:哦,有时候我们这么交流,她说:喂,杰瑞?我回答:哦,嗨,马尔琳。然后就是“杰瑞……”
GEORGE: What about getting off the phone?
乔治:有没有试过离开电话?
JERRY: Ohhhh.. you can't. It's impossible. There's no break in the conversation where you can go, "Alright, then.. " You know, it just goes on and on and on with out a break in the wall. I mean, I gotta put a stop to this.
杰瑞:哦……可不能。这不可能的。她的话里根本没有空间让你插一句:“好吧,那么……”。你知道,一直不停的说啊说啊一刻不停,我是说,我必须喊停了。
GEORGE: Just do it like a Band-Aid. One motion, right off! She is sexy though. Don't you think?
乔治:就像撕下邦迪一样啊。一次性的,立马解决。不过她是有点小性感啦,你觉得吗?
JERRY: Yeah. Yes, she is.
杰瑞:是,是的,可不是嘛。
(Receptionist enters)

RECEPTIONIST: Mr. Costanza?
接待员:康斯坦茨先生?
GEORGE: Yeah.
乔治:是的。
RECEPTIONIST: The doctor'll see you now.
接待员:医生就来了。
GEORGE: (To Jerry, sarcastically) Yeah, doctor. I'm going to have to wait in that little room by myself, aren't I? (Picks up a crossword puzzle) I better take this. I hate the little room. "Oh, hello, Doctor."
乔治:(对杰瑞,讽刺的)是啊,医生。我将要去那间小密室里面孤独等待,是吧?(拿过一个字谜的报纸)我还是带着这个吧,我讨厌小房间。“哦,你好,医生”。
(Scene ends)

[Setting: Night club]
(场景:俱乐部)
JERRY: Waiting room. I hate when they make you wait in the room. 'Cause it says "Waiting room." There's no chance of not waiting, 'cause they call it the waiting room, they're going to use it. They've got it. It's all set up for you to wait. And you sit there, you know, and you've got your little magazine. You pretend you're reading it, but you're really looking at the other people. You know, you're thinking about about them things like "I wonder what he's got. As soon as she goes, I'm getting her magazine." And then, they finally call you and it's a very exciting moment. They finally call you, and you stand up and you kinda look around at the other people in the room. "Well, I guess I've been chosen. I'll see you all later." You know, so you think you're going to see the doctor, but you're not, are you? No. You're going into the next waiting room. The littler waiting room. But if they are, you know, doing some sort of medical thing to you, you want to be in the smallest room that they have, I think. You don't wnat to be in the largest room that they have. You know what I mean? You ever see these operating theaters, that they have, with like, stadium seating? You don't want them doing antying to you that makes other doctors go, "I have to see this!" "Are you kidding? Are they really gonna do that to him?" "Are there seats? Can we get in?" Do they scalp tickets to these things? "I got two for the Winslow tumor, I got two.."
杰瑞:等候室。我讨厌被要求在个房间里等着。因为上面写着“等候室”。不可能不去等待,因为人们叫它“等候室”,他们将进去,使用这房间。其实要你等着都是糊弄人的。你知道的,你坐在那里,带着你的小杂志。你假装你在看杂志,其实你在张望其他人。你在想些事情,“我想他在看什么杂志呢,一旦他走了,我就要他那本杂志。”然后,终于轮到你了,这可是个激动人心的时刻。他们终于叫你的名字了,你起身环顾等候室里的其他人。“好吧,我想我被选中了,咱们待会见啦。”你认为你可以去见医生了,其实不然,可不是嘛。是的,你又要去下一间等候室,更小的房间。但是我想如果他们对你做点啥检查啊,你一定会想待在一间最小的房间里。你可不想在他们最大的那间房里。知道我在说什么吗?你见过“手术舞台”吗?就是像体育场般有座位的?你可不想出现这幅画面吧:医生们说,“我得看看这个!”、“你扯淡吧,他们真的要对他做这些?”、“还有座位吗,我们能进来吗?”他们甚至都可以卖票。“我有两张温氏肿瘤的票子,我有两张……”
(Scene ends)

[Setting: Waiting room]
(场景:等候室)
(George returns)
(乔治回来)
JERRY: So, how was it?
杰瑞:怎么样?
GEORGE: I was in there for two minutes. He didn't do anything. (Imitating doctor) Touch this, feel that. Seventy-five bucks.
乔治:我在那儿两分钟,他啥也没干。(模仿医生)碰碰这儿,摸摸那儿的。75美金!
JERRY: Well, it's a first visit.
杰瑞:唉,这是初诊嘛。
GEORGE: What's seventy-five bucks? What, am I seeing Sinatra in there?! Amd I being entertained? I don't understand this. I'm only paying half.
乔治:75美金就为这?!什么,难道我看到Sinatra天王啦?!(注:美著名歌手)有啥余兴节目?费解!我只付一半钱。
JERRY: You can't do that.
杰瑞:你不能这么做。
GEORGE: Why not?
乔治:为什么不?
JERRY: He's a doctor. You gotta pay what he says.
杰瑞:他是医生。他说多少你都得付。
GEORGE: Oh, no, no, no. I pay what I say.
乔治:哦,不,不,不。我说多少就是多少。
(Scene ends)

[Setting: Jerry's car]
(场景:杰瑞的车里)
MARLENE: Are you feeling weird?
马尔琳:你有没有觉得诡异?
JERRY: No, I'm fine.
杰瑞:没有,我还好啦。
MARLENE: Nothing really happened.
马尔琳:啥也没有发生。
JERRY: Yeah, I know.
杰瑞:是,我知道。
MARLENE: We just kissed a little. People kiss.
马尔琳:我们只是亲了一下下。普通的礼仪吻啦。
JERRY: Yeah.
杰瑞:可不是嘛。
MARLENE: Well.. night.
马尔琳:那么……晚安。
(Leans over and kisses Jerry)
(凑过来吻杰瑞)
JERRY: Good night.
杰瑞:晚安。
(Scene ends)

[Setting: Jerry's apartment]
(场景:杰瑞家)
(Kramer enters with a golf club)
(克雷默拿着高尔夫球棒进屋)
KRAMER: Hey.
克雷默:嗨。
JERRY: Hey.
杰瑞:嗨。
KRAMER: I got it! This time, I got it!
克雷默:我办到!这次我办到了!
JERRY: Alright.
杰瑞:好耶。
KRAMER: Hips! See, it's all hips.
克雷默:喝彩声!全是喝彩声!
JERRY: Uh-huh.
杰瑞:嗯。
KRAMER: You gotta come through with the hips first. (Demonstrates)
克雷默:你先得穿过一群欢呼的人群。(表现)
JERRY: That is out there.
杰瑞:好大的场面。
(Kramer notices Jerry's eating cantaloupe, his eyes light up)
(克雷默发现杰瑞吃甜瓜,眼朝上看)
KRAMER: Joe's?
克雷默:乔家水果?
JERRY: No, supermarket.
杰瑞:不,超市。
KRAMER: Well, is it good?
克雷默:好吧,好吃嘛?
JERRY: It's okay.
杰瑞:还行啦。
KRAMER: Let me taste it. (Takes a bite, spits it out) See, that stinks. You can't eat that. You should take it back.
克雷默:让我尝尝。(试了一口,吐了)不是我说什么,这太难吃了。你怎么能吃这个呢。你该还回去。
JERRY: I'm not taking it back.
杰瑞:我才不拿回去呢。
KRAMER: Alright, I'll take it back. I'm going by there.
克雷默:好吧,我拿回去。反正我路过。
JERRY: I don't care about it.
杰瑞:我不在乎。
KRAMER: Jerry, you should care. Cantaloupe like this should be taken out of circulation.
克雷默:杰瑞,你应该在乎的。这种甜瓜就不配活在这个世上。
JERRY: Alright. Take it back.
杰瑞:好吧,拿回去。
(Phone rings, Jerry is reluctant to answer it)
(电话铃响,杰瑞不情愿的去接听)
JERRY: (On his answering machine) Leave a message, I'll call you back.
杰瑞:(答录机)请留言,我会给您回电。
MARLENE: (Leaving a message) Jerry, have you ever taken a bath in the dark? If I'm not talking into the soap right now, call me back.
马尔琳:(留言)杰瑞,你有在黑暗中洗澡吗?我现在全身都是泡泡,给我回电。
KRAMER: Well?
克雷默:啥意思?
JERRY: Marlene
杰瑞:是马尔琳。
KRAMER: (Smiles) Oh. Oh, Marlene.
克雷默:(笑)哦,哦,马尔琳。
JERRY: Yeah, I took her home one night - we kinda started up a little bit in the car.
杰瑞:是的,有一晚我送她回家时我们在车上小亲热了一下。
KRAMER: I thought you were trying to get rid of her?
克雷默:你不是号称要甩掉她的嘛。
JERRY: I was. She's got me, like, hypnotized.
杰瑞:我是啊。她搞定我了,就像催眠一样。
KRAMER: Does George know?
克雷默:乔治知道不?
JERRY: No, he'd go nuts.
杰瑞:不,不然他会疯的。
KRAMER: Yeah, no kidding.
克雷默:好家伙,还用你说。
JERRY: I feel terrible. (Kramer smiles) I mean, I've seen her a couple of times since then, and I know I can't go any further, but.. I've just got this like, psycho-sexual hold over me. I just want her, I can't breathe. It's like a drug.
杰瑞:我感觉很糟。(克雷默笑)我是说,我们就见过几次,我也知道我不能再和她纠缠下去了,但是……我好像被她“心性”吸引了一样。我想要她,我无法呼吸了,就像吸毒。
KRAMER: Woah, psycho-sexual.
克雷默:喔,心性。
JERRY: I don't know how I'm going to tell him.
杰瑞:我不知道怎么跟乔治说。
KRAMER: Man, I don't understand people. I mean, why would George want to deprive you of pleasure? Is it just me?
克雷默:伙计,我不了解你们。不过乔治为什么要剥夺你的快乐呢?我就不会。
JERRY: It's partially you, yeah.
杰瑞:你不会,是吧。
KRAMER: You're his friend. Better that she should sleep with someone else. Some jerk that he doesn't even know.
克雷默:你是他的朋友,总比她和其他男人睡来得好吧。那些乔治都不认识的混蛋们。
JERRY: Well, he can't kill me, right?
杰瑞:也是,他总不能宰了我,是吧?
KRAMER: You're a human being.
克雷默:你也是个凡人。
JERRY: I mean, she called me. I haven't called her. She started it.
杰瑞:我是说,她给我电话,我可没有给她打过,她开始的。
KRAMER: You're flesh and blood.
克雷默:你血气方刚。
JERRY: I'm a nice guy.
杰瑞:我是个不错的小伙子。
(Enter Elaine, she's holding a lamp)
(依莲进,掌灯)
ELAINE: Hi. (Hands Jerry the lamp)
依莲:嗨。(把灯给杰瑞)
JERRY: Oh, my little airplane lamp.
杰瑞:哦,我的小飞机灯。
ELAINE: You know, you have the slowest elevator in the entire city? That's hard to get used to when you're in so many other fast ones.
依莲:你知道不,你们家的电梯是全城最慢的!当你用过那么多快速电梯后很难适应这老家伙。
JERRY: Well, the apartment elevators are always slower than the offices, because you don't have to be home on time.
杰瑞:住宅里的电梯总归要比办公楼的电梯慢一些,因为你回家不需要准时。
ELAINE: Unless you're married to a dictator..
依莲:除非你嫁给一个独裁者……
JERRY: Yeah.. because they would be very demanding people.
杰瑞:是……这种人总是很苛刻的。
ELAINE: Right. Exactly. So I imagine at some point, somebody's going to offer me some cantaloupe.
依莲:是啊。可不是嘛。我想啊,也许某个时刻,某人会给我一点甜瓜尝尝。
KRAMER: Nope. No good.
克雷默:不。没门儿。
JERRY: Well, you know what they say: Luck in love, Unlucky with fruit.
杰瑞:你知道他们怎么说嘛:情场得意,果场失意。
KRAMER: Well, I'm taking this back. (Leaves)
克雷默:好吧,我把这些送回去。(离开)
ELAINE: So, I had what you might call a little encounter this morning.
依莲:那么,早上我又遇到了我跟你们提起过的邂逅。
JERRY: Really? That guy who stopped saying hello?
杰瑞:真的?那个路过不说你好的家伙?
ELAINE: Yep.
依莲:是。
JERRY: You talked to him?
杰瑞:你和他说话啦?
ELAINE: Yep. I spotted him getting his mail. And at first, I was just going to walk on by, but then I thought "no, no, no, no. Do not be afraid of this man."
依莲:是。他取邮件时我拦住他了,本来想路过算了,但后来我想“不,不,不,不要怕这个人”。
JERRY: Right.
杰瑞:没错。
ELAINE: So, I walked up behind him and I tapped him on the shoulder. And I said, "Hi, remember me?" And he furrows his brow as if he's really trying to figure it out. So I said to him, I said, "You little phony. You know exactly who I am."
依莲:那么,我上前一步,拍拍他的肩,说:“嗨,记得我不?”,他的眉毛纠结好像很难想起来。我又跟他说了:“你这个小瘪三,你很清楚我是谁。”
JERRY: "You little phony"?
杰瑞:“你这个小瘪三”?
ELAINE: I did. I most certainly did. And he said, he goes, "Oh, yeah. You're Jeanette's friend. We did meet once." And I said, "Well, how do you go from that to totally ignoring a person when they walk by?"
依莲:没错。我差不多做到了。然后他说,“哦,想起来了,你是杰内特的朋友。我们见过一次。”我说,“是啊,你怎么就变成对我视而不见了呢?”
JERRY: Amazing.
杰瑞:精彩极了。
ELAINE: And he says, he says, "Look, I just didn't want to say hello anymore, alright?" And I said, "Fine. Fine I didn't want to say hello anymore either, but I wanted you to know that I'm aware of it."
依莲:然后他又说了,“唉,我只是不想再说你好了,行吧?”然后我说,“行,行,我也不再说你好了,但是我想让你知道我受伤害了。”
(Elaine tastes some cantaloupe)
(依莲尝尝甜瓜)
JERRY: You are the Queen of Confrontation. You're my new hero. In fact, you've inspired me. I'm gonna call George about something right now.
杰瑞:你可真是对质女王。你是我的新偶像。不瞒你说,你激励我了。我现在要跟乔治说点事情。
ELAINE: This cantaloupe stinks. (Spits it out)
依莲:这甜瓜难吃死了。(吐了)
(Scene ends)

[Setting: Coffee Shop]
(场景:咖啡馆)
GEORGE: I don't care.
乔治:我不在乎。
JERRY: You're kidding.
杰瑞:你开玩笑吧。
GEORGE: No, I don't care.
乔治:不,我真不在乎。
JERRY: You mean that?
杰瑞:你确定?
GEORGE: Absolutely.
乔治:确定一定以及肯定。
JERRY: You don't care?
杰瑞:你不在乎?
GEORGE: No.
乔治:无视。
JERRY: How could you not care?
杰瑞:你怎么能不在乎呢?
GEORGE: I don't know. But I don't. I'm actually almost happy to hear it.
乔治:我不知道。但是我就是不在乎。我甚至很高兴听到这个。
JERRY: I thought you'd be upset.
杰瑞:我以为你会很不爽呢。
GEORGE: I guess I should be but I'm not.
乔治:我也以为会这样,但是我没有。
JERRY: Am I a bad person? Did I do something terrible?
杰瑞:我是不是很坏啊?是不是做了很垃圾的事情?
GEORGE: No, you're a fine person. You're a humanitarian. She's very sexy.
乔治:不,你是个很好的家伙。你是人道主义者。她很性感。
JERRY: That voice. That voice. She's driving me crazy.
杰瑞:那个声音,那个声音,她把我逼疯了。
GEORGE: I know, I know.
乔治:我知道,了解。
JERRY: So I can see her tonight, and you don't care?
杰瑞:那么我今晚能见她啦,你不在乎?
GEORGE: See her tonight. See her tomarrow. Go. Knock yourself out. She's too crazy for me.
乔治:今晚去见她,明天去见她,放手去吧。尽情享受吧。我可吃不消她的疯劲儿。
JERRY: Alright. As long as you're okay. Because I can't stop thinking about her.
杰瑞:好吧,只要你没问题,因为我现在可是没有一刻不想她啊。
GEORGE: I'm okay. I'm fine. I'm wonderful. I never felt better in my whole life.
乔治:我没事,我很好,我好得不得了。前所未有的好。
JERRY: Good. And I'll tell you what.. You don't have to pay me back the thirty-five I gave to the chiropractor for the rest of your bill.
杰瑞:很好。那我跟你说……我帮你付清了按摩理疗的账单,你不用还我35块钱了。
GEORGE: (Angry) You paid that crook?!
乔治:(发疯)你给那个骗子钱了?
JERRY: I had to.
杰瑞:我不得不啊。
GEORGE: He didn't do anything, Jerry. It's a scam! Who told you to do that?
乔治:他什么也没做啊,杰瑞,这是骗局,谁要你这么做的?!
JERRY: It was embarrassing to me.
杰瑞:我觉得不付有点尴尬。
GEORGE: I was trying to make a point.
乔治:我努力去表明我的立场来着。
JERRY: Why don't you make a point with your own doctor? (George gulps) What's wrong?
杰瑞:你为啥不对你自个儿的医生表明立场?有啥问题吗?
GEORGE: (Gasping) I think I swallowed a fly! ..I swallowed a fly! What do I do? What can happen?
乔治:我大概吞下了个苍蝇!我吞下个苍蝇!我该怎么做?!会发生什么事啊?!
(Scene ends)

[Setting: Jerry's car]
(场景:杰瑞车中)
JERRY: ..So, you want to come up for a few minutes?
杰瑞:……你想要上去坐坐吗?
MARLENE: ..I'm sorry, Jerry. I just don't think this is going to work.
马尔琳:……不好意思,杰瑞,我只是觉得这关系大概行不通。
JERRY: Really? I thought..
杰瑞:真的?我认为……
MARLENE: I know, I'm sorry.
马尔琳:我知道,对不起。
JERRY: I guess I just didn't expect it from the way you've been acting.
杰瑞:我猜从你的表现打死我都想不到有这一出。
MARLENE: You sure you want to talk about this? 'Cause I sure don't.
马尔琳:你确信要谈这个?我可不想谈。
JERRY: Of course I want to talk about it.
杰瑞:我当然要谈这个问题。
MARLENE: Well, okay. I guess things changed for me on Tuesday night.
马尔琳:好吧,好。周二那晚改变了我。
JERRY: Tuesday night? What happened Tuesday night?
杰瑞:周二晚上?周二晚发生了什么?
MARLENE: ..I saw your act.
马尔琳:……我看到你的演出了。
JERRY: My act? What does that have to do with anything?
杰瑞:我的演出?这跟这些有啥关系呀?
MARLENE: Well, to be honest, it just didn't make it for me. It's just so much fluff.
马尔琳:好吧,老实说,反正不是我要的样子,太多没有意义的话了。
JERRY: I can't believe this. So what are you saying? You didn't like my act, so that's it?
杰瑞:难以置信。你想说什么?你不喜欢我的演出,那又如何?
MARLENE: I can't be with someone if I don't respect what they do.
马尔琳:如果我不尊重那个人的工作,我肯定不能和那个人在一起。
JERRY: You're a cashier!
杰瑞:你只是个收银员!
MARLENE: Look, Jerry, it's just not my kind of humor.
马尔琳:听着,杰瑞,反正那不是我喜欢的幽默。
JERRY: You can't go by the audience that night. It was late. They were terrible.
杰瑞:你不能根据当晚观众的表现来看啊,那天很晚了,那些观众很没素质。
MARLENE: I heard the material.
马尔琳:我听到你的“料”了。
JERRY: I have other stuff. You should come see me on the weekend.
杰瑞:我还有别的料呢。你应该周末过来听听。
(Scene ends)

[Setting: Night club]
(场景:俱乐部)
JERRY: Women need to like the job of the guy they're with. If they don't like the job, they don't like the guy. Men know this. Which is why we make up the phony bogus names for the jobs that we have. "Well, right now, I'm the regional management supervisor." "I'm in development, research, consulting." Men on the other hand, if they are physically attracted to a woman are not that concerned with her job. Are we? Men don't really care. Men'll just go, "Really? Slaughterhouse? Is that were you work? That sounds interesting. So whatdya got a big cleaver there? You're just lopping their heads off? That sounds great! Listen, why don't you shower up, and we'll get some burgers and catch a movie."
杰瑞:女人得喜欢那个男人的工作才能和他在一起。要是她们不喜欢那工作的话,她们就不会喜欢那男人。男人们都知道这些。所以我们才绞尽脑汁编造出一些假的公司、职位名字。“嗯,现在,我是区域管理督导”,“我在发展部,研发,咨询”。而男人在被一个女人吸引的时候,才不会在乎她的职业呢。可不是嘛?我们一点也不在乎。男人只会说,”真的?在屠宰场?这是你工作的地方?听起来很有意思嘛。你们是不是有很大的屠刀?你们就是把畜生们的脑袋砍了?听起来真棒!听着,要不你冲个凉,我们去吃点汉堡、看个电影啥的?
 

END OF SHOW.